#my boss has asked me to call hr when they open + ive told her i cant bc im deaf but asked if i can email instead just waiting on her reply

[phagodyke]

called in sick to work for the first time in an entire year.... lalalalaaa

[imaginexmeintheuniverse]

An X Co. Xmas

12 Days of Christmas OTP Challenge

Day 1: Character A and Character B, sworn enemies, are chosen to prepare the company Christmas Party.

A/N: well this is starting off great im already late on the first day, but i was getting wrecked by uni and wanted to do some research first so please correct me if i made any mistakes concerning Hanukkah! This is actually so long but I had a lot of fun writing it <3 Also i recently started binge watching the office and i just finished my finals which incidentally was for management so here goes!

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i. an infuriating announcement

"You're shitting me, Ro," you deadpan, already feeling like giving up. "Can't someone else do it? Anyone?!"

"Sorry, the rest of the team already have their assignments for the month, and this is yours— and Peter's."

Being in charge of the big X Company Christmas party is an event you've wanted to take the lead on since you joined this department, but being paired up with none other than Peter Maximoff, makes this the best opportunity and the worst case scenario.  

"But he's an idiotic man-child!" You're not even sure how he made his way up to being part of this project management team. You assume it must have something to do with his father being co-chairman of the company. "Yesterday he ordered fifteen pizzas under my name!"

"To be fair, you did glue all his pens and pencils together last week," she smirks, and lets out a small laugh at the memory. "In any case, the project groups for this month have been divided by aptitudes and experience like they always are, and you two ended up together because everyone else was matched up with other projects. I know you two don't exactly get along the best, but upper management is on my ass and the rest of the team is already totally booked with the hectic holiday season."

"Is there anything you can do?"

"Sorry, babe," she apologizes, and give you a sympathetic lopsided smile.

"What's the use of being best friends with the boss if I can't get sorted with a better partner," you grumble with a playful smile, because you obviously love Ororo, but you're not sure how long you'll last without wanting to do something that might land you in HR.

"If it's any consolation, he's not thrilled about being your partner either."

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ii. an idiotic man-child

"This obviously isn't working out—"

"We can't agree on anything—"

"You two are supposed to be coordinating this event together—" Ororo ducks her head between her hands and exhales out of exasperation as she rubs her temples.

"She locked me in the conference room!"

"He put all my office supplies in Jell-O!"

"You need to stop bickering like children and get your shit together!" She stands from her desk, chiding you and Peter. You both sit in adjacent chairs in front of her and you feel like you're back and school and have landed yourself in the principal's office. "I can't be babysitting you constantly, so you'll just have to pull it together and figure it out before you get kicked off this team!"

You and Peter nod in unison, and then exchange side glares at each other when Ororo is sitting back down. She is an amazing manager, and to be fair you and Peter had spent the last thirty minutes complaining about one another, so it's understandable that her patience is running thin.

She takes a moment to collect herself, smoothing out her skirt and tucking a loose strand of hair back into her tight bun. "As I've told you before, it's too late to add or exchange team members with their assignments this month, but I can give you the intern to help you out."

"Kurt?"

"Yes, I've already sent him a memo and he'll be back in the bullpen waiting for you." With that, she dismisses you, and you walk out of her office with Peter following right behind you.

"I hope you don't plan on nagging the intern to death, wouldn't want to scare the poor kid away," he taunts you, catching up to your quicker walking pace to beside you.

"I hope you can actually do your job for once, so that he won't have to do it for you," you retort, without even glancing his way.

"Chill, princess—"

"We don't all have a boss for a father who will help us float to the top— I had to work my ass off to get here and I'm not going to let you drag me down!" You're fuming, and judging by the slight falter in his usual smirk, you think you might have gone too far.

He doesn't say anything for a moment, and then you see Kurt smiling and waving at both of you from across the room. You offer him an awkward smile and Peter gives him a weak wave, both of you dampened from your exchange.

There's no point in wasting any more time with the fast-approaching deadline, so you turn to him, totally neutral and say, "We have work to do, let's just delegate tasks and check up on each other later."

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iii. an unmethodical arrangement

"Damn it!" Peter shouts from his desk, and you look up at him from your computer, distracted by his sudden outburst. He slams the phone back into place in hanging up, and you raise an eyebrow at him. "That's the third band to cancel," he says, exhaling slowly to calm himself down.

He was in charge of music, and as the project deadline approaches with the holidays, it's getting harder to lock down on services. Even you're having a hard time trying to find a restaurant that's available to cater. You decide to give your tired eyes a rest by closing your monitor and leaning back in your chair, blinking a few times to adjust to more favourable lighting.

You're both exhausted from running around all day, and you already sent the intern home a few hours ago. Furthermore, watching the sun set so early through the widow walls, and always having to work so many hours after dark has been getting really depressing. Despite it being demanding and requiring crazy hours, you do love this job.

"Tell me about it, all the restaurants are long overbooked."

There's a moment where all you hear is the clicking of Peter's fingers gliding over the keyboard and then he speaks up, "My mom is friends with this restaurant owner who owes her a favour." He turns his monitor to show you a simplistic webpage. "It's a small family business, they're not going to be booked because they don't advertise their catering service, and they have a menu that can suit all kinds of food restrictions."

"That's great!" you exclaim, taking note of the restaurant name. "Okay, now we just need to find the music." You let out a low sigh, and pull out your planning binder to hopefully gain some inspiration or answers. This fails you, as you end up merely staring blankly at the flipping pages— that is until you fall on one in particular that could help you out. "Hey Peter," you call out to him, and he stops spinning to face you. "What about Warren?"

"What about Warren?" He asks, curious as to why you're bringing up your old teammate. You worked on a lot of projects with Warren before he got promoted to higher management last year.

"He has a bunch of connections, and he hired this great DJ for one of the big fundraisers last year. Why don't we ask him?"

"That's actually not a bad idea, I'll email him." Peter smiles, scribbling on a sticky note and posting it on his computer screen. "But I'll take care of that tomorrow morning," he thinks out loud. "Can we meet earlier tomorrow morning?"

Glancing at the clock, you wonder why the hell he would want to meet earlier since you two have been working so late. "Why?"

"Hanukkah starts tomorrow," he answers simply. "It's already been approved by management, but we are partners so I just wanna make sure you're cool with it."

"Yeah, that's fine," you reply, giving him a small smile. Honestly, this is the longest you two have gone without bickering, but it actually feels nice to be getting along with him.

"All right, I'm gonna call it quits for tonight," he says, gathering his bag and coat. "I'll see you tomorrow morning, Y/N."

"Have a good night."

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iv. an evening before

Everything since those little speed bumps you hit concerning the music and food has run really smoothly, and you and Peter have been getting along a lot better since that late night in the office. You developed a steady work flow and actually found yourself laughing at some of his lame jokes. Peter was surprised when he realized that he no longer subconsciously rolled his eyes every time you opened your mouth, and he'd feel himself light up when you greeted him in the morning.

"I think everything should be fine," Peter announces, as you check off the items on the task list.

"All the services are on schedule, and the design department is putting the final touches in the hall," Kurt reports, tucking a few stray papers back into his planner.

"All right, then you may be dismissed, we'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning to greet the caterers and waiting staff." Kurt nods, and bids you and Peter a good evening before heading off into the gentle snowfall of NYC. "We finished with an hour to spare," You smile at Peter who loosens his tie as you both gather your things and head out of the building together. "It'll give me extra time to try not to stress out about tomorrow."

Peter chuckles, and nods in agreement to your statement. "I'll be able to go surprise my sister and pick her up from school."

"You have a sister?"

"Yeah, my little sister, Wanda, she's in middle school and hates the school bus."

"I totally understand, the bus is another kind of hell."

He opens his mouth to say goodbye, but then you remember that you had something for him, and you reach into your bag to pull out a present tied up in a pretty satin bow. "Before you go, I have something for you," you say shyly, not sure why you feel a heat creeping up to your cheeks when you notice how charming Peter looks with snowflakes resting delicately on his dark eyelashes.

"What's this for?" He asks, curious about the neatly wrapped box you place in his hands.

"Today is the last day of Hanukkah isn't it?"

"Yeah," he confirms, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

He tears the wrapping off, opens the box, and pulls out the dreidel you put inside. "I'm sorry, it's kind of lame— you probably have a ton of them."

"No, this is really great," he says with a smile, turning the top in his hands to admire the craftsmanship. You happened to walk past a kiosk with handmade dreidels when you had to take a different way home the previous night, and couldn't help but notice how pretty they were. "Thank you, Y/N."

A few seconds pass by awkwardly where you're both smiling, but aren't sure what to do, until Peter leans forward and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a hug. The foreign affection from him is completely new, but surprisingly warm, comfortable, and welcome. You've just let yourself melt into the hug when he breaks off, and it's like you've been snapped out of a daze and left out in the cold. Still feeling slightly disoriented, you wish him a happy Hanukkah, and leave it at that before you make a fool of yourself. You start to head off towards the subway when Peter calls out to you.

"Do you—" He hesitates for a moment, unsure of what he's asking exactly.

"Did you say something?" You turn back around to face him and he stutters for a moment, because the sun shining perfectly on your features with snow falling all around you has him unable to process anything else around him. "Peter?"

"D-Do you want to come? I figure it's better than trying not to stress out at home alone."

Your lips curve up into a smile and you're not even conscious of how much your heart rate has picked up yet. Everything is sorted for the company party tomorrow, and you've discovered that Peter isn't too bad to be around, so what's the harm?

"Sure."

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v. an important night

"Wow—" Peter utters breathlessly, stunned by the sight of you entering the hall. Last time he saw you was less than a half hour ago, and he'd be lying if he were to say that he weren't impressed by your quick transformation. Just moments ago you were running around in your work clothes, with a clipboard and unruly hairs sticking out in all wrong places. Now that the party's started and everything is running smoothly, you seem a lot more calm and managed to fix up your hair and makeup flawlessly. He hadn't seen your dress yet, and even though he thought you were still the prettiest person in the room in your stressed out mess, you're definitely a showstopper now.

"You should wipe the drool off your chin before Y/N notices," Scott smirks at Peter as he walks up to him with Jean on his arm. As if on cue, you notice Peter and your other team members from across the room and wave at the group, a smile gracing your lips that makes Peter weak in the knees. Scott, of course, notices this and feels the need to tease him about it. "If I didn't know how much you two hate each other's guts, I'd think you might actually like each other as more than just archenemies."

"Scott, leave the poor guy alone," Jean chimes in, grinning playfully. "He obviously has it bad."

"You guys don't know what you're talking about." Peter runs a hand through his silver hair that's neatly coiffed for once. "Y/N and I are just partners on this event, and then everything is going to go back to normal," He laughs it off, despite what he just said settling uncomfortably in his mind. Working with you over the last few weeks has brought out the best in both of you; you've been getting along great, even having a couple of inside jokes, and last night he had so much fun. The way your eyes would light up with genuine interest as you listened to his explanations of the rituals, how well you seemed to fit in with his family, and Wanda, she adored you. He found himself frequently gazing at you with a goofy grin on his face, not even realizing he was staring until you'd make eye contact with him, and then he'd get all flustered from being caught.

All this to say that he's very confused about his feelings. He likes the relationship akin to friendship the two of you have developed, but he also feels something more. The thought that makes him more uncomfortable is: what will happen when this is over? Will you just be disbanded and assigned to different projects after? Will you go back to being at each other's throats, will you still be friendly with each other, or will you just never speak again unless you're assigned to the same project again?

"Peter, you need to calm down." Jean interrupts his overthinking, offering him a comforting smile. "Go ask her to dance."

"It's like you read my mind," He shoots her a wink and finishes off his drink before heading off in your direction.

"Hey Peter," You greet him after excusing yourself from a group conversation. "This is going great isn't it?"

"Y-Yeah, it's awesome."

"Who would've known we'd make a half-decent team?" You grin at him playfully, and also notice that he seems a little spaced out. "Are you okay, Maximoff?"

"Do y-you wanna dance?"

"It would be my pleasure," You extend your hand, and he takes it in his larger one, leading you to the dance floor where he slips his other arm around your waist. He starts to guide you is slow circles, feet following the rhythm of the smooth tune. Throughout the course of the song, your bodies get closer to one another, and you hope he can't tell how warm your cheeks are upon realizing this. "Wow, Peter, where'd you learn to dance like this?"

"My, uh, mom made me take lessons when I was younger," he says sheepishly, a blush creeping its way onto his face.

"I'm impressed."

The song ends, and you thank each other for the dance. This is the when you'd normally break apart, but neither of you moves— neither of you wants to. The next song starts to play and you're the only ones not moving on the dance floor.

"You look amazing, by the way," he tells you, and you feel like you're lungs are failing you.

"Thanks, you clean up real nice yourself." Another few seconds go by without anything happening, other than the tension continuously building.

"Well- th-thanks for the dance, a-and being a good partner."

Peter mentally slaps himself as you smile and start to walk off the dance floor. There's obviously something there, why didn't he do anything? Idiot. Just when he thinks he's blown his only chance, you spin on your heel and march back to the spot he hasn't moved from, pull him down by the shoulders to press your lips against his. He barely has time to process what's happening before you pull back, leaving him reeling.

"Whoa," is all he can manage to get out. It was only a few seconds, but your kiss took all the air out of his lungs.

"May I have this dance?" You ask nervously, taking a shot at the dark, hoping he feels the same way you do.

He doesn't say anything else, unable to keep the goofy grin off his face. Instead of speaking, he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you flush against his body and leans in for another kiss. His soft lips move against yours gently, and as you let your eyes flutter shut, you feel that same warmth as when he first hugged you the previous night.

When you break apart, neither of you can keep the smiles off your face, and you happily let him lead you in circles on the dance floor.

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vi. an extra scene

Peter hugs you from behind and presses a quick kiss to your cheek before heading to his desk.

"Congrats you two!" You and Peter both jump at Ororo's less-than-subtle entrance. "The party was a hit, and upper management wants to add you to the New Year fundraiser event planning team!"

You both thank her for the opportunity and accept the detail files she hands you.

"Oh, and congrats for the other thing too," She says, gesturing between you and Peter. "You know what that means, right?"

"We get a raise for organizing the party of the year?" Peter half-jokingly suggests.

"Real funny," she chuckles, making her way to her office. "You're going to have to file this with HR, now."

[andthisisthewonder]

A/N: Despite starting this last year and working on it on and off since, I still only managed to finish this today. It’s a longer one at just over 10,000 words. Title from Frozen. Yes, Frozen, lol.

These past few months have been hell. Not only has Peeta been in and out of court battling his ex-wife for sole custody of his daughter, his new boss Ms. Everdeen won’t cut him any slack. So far, this holiday season sucks.

Someone Worth Melting For

The harsh clatter of high heels against linoleum announced her approach. Everyone sprang into action, a domino effect down the two rows of desks in the office. Madge clicked out of Pandora, which had been playing Christmas music behind the design she worked on. Delly shoved the brightly-colored wrappers of several Hershey kisses into her purse. With a wave of his arm, Finnick knocked all the Christmas decorations he had set out that morning into his desk drawer.

It wasn’t as if Katniss had forbidden them from celebrating Christmas. She just strongly discouraged a cluttered desk, and, for whatever reason, seemed to hate the holiday season.

Peeta shoved his cell phone in his pants pocket a second before Katniss rounded the corner. If she had heard Burl Ives urging everyone to have a “holly, jolly Christmas” as she approached, she made no indication. Unfortunately, she didn’t ignore the cell phone on Finnick’s desk. In his haste to hide the decorations, he had forgotten all about it.

While the rule about keeping personal phones out of sight during work hours existed before Katniss became their boss, she was the first one to actually enforce it. She was, above everything, a stickler for rules.

“Phone,” Katniss said as she walked down the aisle in between the two rows of desks.

The slam of Finnick’s drawer stopped her. She looked down at him, eyebrow raised. This was her usual expression when she was displeased. It was eerie how quiet she could be. Even when chewing someone out, she never raised her voice. She just turned that cold, disappointed expression toward her target and waited for him or her to wilt.

“Sorry.” Finnick forced a smile. “I was just eager to complete your request.”

“If only you applied such enthusiasm to your actual work,” Katniss said.

Finnick’s eyes widened, but before he could respond, Katniss disappeared into her office. As soon as the door shut behind her, Finnick tugged at his hair and pantomimed a silent scream.

“I thought she had a meeting,” Madge said, leaning across the aisle.

Peeta looked over his shoulder to confirm the blinds in Katniss’s office were closed. “Guess it ended early.”

“Everyone probably froze to death in Elsa’s presence,” Finnick said.

“Oh my goodness, would you stop with the Elsa crap?” Delly demanded, popping another Hershey kiss into her mouth. “I don’t know why you have to be so mean.”

Katniss had been their boss for three months, but it had only taken three days for Finnick to dub her the Ice Queen. Eventually, Madge had suggested they use the name Elsa, so they could shittalk Katniss in public without worry of repercussions. It was childish, but they desperately needed the outlet. Katniss was, to put it mildly, a real piece of work.

“Uh, maybe it’s because she’s a nightmare?” Finnick suggested.

Peeta leaned back in his chair and waved his open hand. Delly cast a surreptitious look at Katniss’s office before throwing Peeta a piece of candy.

“She really isn’t,” Delly insisted. “If you’d just have an actual conversation with her--”

“No thanks,” Finnick cut in. “I tried that. You know things have been...difficult at home.”

Delly’s expression softened. “How is Annie?”

Finnick stared down at the keyboard. Delly, Peeta, and Madge inched closer so the rest of their co-workers wouldn’t overhear. It wasn’t a huge department - there were only twelve of them - so everyone knew each other, but that didn’t mean everyone had to know everyone’s business.

“She’s back in the hospital,” Finnick said quietly.

Peeta winced, his gaze automatically flickering to the time bar on his computer: December 21. Only four days to Christmas, and Finnick might be spending it alone.

“The holidays have always been a trigger for her. I just thought we were prepared this year. I thought I was doing everything right��”

“You’re doing your best,” Delly said.

“I’ve just been stressed out. It’s hard to focus when I’m wondering how she’s feeling, if she’s lucid…” Finnick trailed off. “Anyway, I ventured into the Ice Queen’s office and asked if I could be taken off the Jensen project.”

“And?” Delly prompted.

“What do you think? She told me if I was too preoccupied to finish it, she’d be happy to relieve me of the rest of my projects too.”

A burst of anger shot through Peeta, staining his cheeks red. “She threatened to fire you?”

“Basically.”

Peeta clenched his fist and swallowed the stream of obscenities that threatened to spill from his mouth. Anger was an all too familiar emotion. He tried not to let it get the best of him, tried not to let it explode into a rage, but he couldn’t always help it. He had inherited his mother’s temper.

“Unbelievable,” Madge said. “I’d offer to help with your workload, but she just dumped two more projects into my lap.”

The landline on Peeta’s desk rang, interrupting their chat. Madge, Delly, and Finnick settled back into their chairs and returned to work as Peeta answered.

“Peeta Mellark.”

“Hello, Mr. Mellark, this is Nurse Henderson at Panem Elementary.”

Fuck.

Peeta squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed the bridge of his nose as he gave the person on the other end short, affirmative answers.

“I’ll be right there,” Peeta finally said, hanging up the phone.

“Everything okay?” Finnick asked.

“It’s Paige.”

“Again?” Madge asked.

Finnick sighed. “Good luck with Elsa.”

Before Peeta could move, Katniss opened her office door and cleared her throat. The noise immediately dissipated as all eyes turned toward her.

“After much consideration, I’ve decided to keep our department open the day after Christmas,” Katniss announced.

A chorus of groans rang out, but Katniss ignored them.

“With the amount of work that needs to be finished before the New Year, it would be irresponsible to close,” she continued.

Peeta had worked here for Abernathy Inc. for seven years, and every single year, the office had been closed from December 24th to the 26th. The decision was made in each individual department by the supervisor, but none of Katniss’s predecessors had ever decided to actually open the day after Christmas.

“We’re lucky Christmas Eve is a Sunday this year,” Finnick said.

“I bet she’d make us work Christmas if she could,” Madge said.

“Mr. Mellark?” Katniss called. “A word?”

Peeta followed Katniss into her office. She settled into her chair, but he remained standing.

“I need to take the afternoon off,” he said.

“Please take a seat.”

“It’s a family emergency. I really need to--”

Katniss stood suddenly, and walked around him to shut the door. When she returned to her seat, she folded her hands and looked up at him. Her face remained maddeningly calm.

“I received your time off request for next Wednesday afternoon,” she said.

“Yes. Is there a problem?”

“Look, Mr. Mellark, you’re a hard worker. Your designs are always top quality, but you’ve been missing deadlines, and I know Delly’s been doing some of your work for you.”

This time the flush of his cheeks stemmed from embarrassment. He had always prided himself on being a capable, diligent employee no matter where he worked. But the past several  months had been hell.

“I can’t allow you to leave early today and take off Wednesday afternoon. It’s just not feasible.”

Peeta’s jaw clenched. “I know I’m out of personal time. I can take it unpaid.”

“That’s not the issue. I need your current slate of projects completed before January 1st.”

Peeta balled his fists at his sides, his fingernails cutting into his palms, as he forced himself to remain calm. He was all too aware of the minutes ticking by. Paige was waiting for him.

“Well, Ms. Everdeen, with all due respect, this is ridiculous.” When her expression didn’t change, he nearly kicked her desk. He wanted some kind of reaction out of her, proof that she was more than a well-oiled robot. “I’m not waiting around. I told you it’s an emergency, and I’m leaving. Fire me if you want. I don’t care.”

He headed toward the door.

“Mr. Mellark,” Katniss said.

He grabbed the doorknob, but before he could storm out, two very strange things happened.

One, Katniss raised her voice, and two, she called him by his first name.

“Peeta, wait!”

It was a weird quirk of hers that she referred to everyone by their last names. Peeta would have preferred she use his first, but for whatever reason, she insisted on maintaining a certain distance from her employees.

When Peeta turned, he was surprised to find Katniss had come around her desk and had her hand outstretched, as if to stop him.

“You’re not required to disclose whatever is going on in your personal life. It’s none of my business. However, if there truly is a problem that’s going to continue to interfere with your work, then I think it’d be best if you explained what was going on.”

Peeta glanced at his watch. Anxiety burned in his chest, but he forced himself to take a breath. Paige was safe. She knew he was coming. He’d get to her soon.

Katniss gestured to the chair across from her desk. With great reluctance, Peeta sat down.

“Would you prefer I get someone from HR in here?” she asked.

“No, it’s…” Peeta stared down at his hands. “I’ve been in and out of court these past few months battling my ex-wife for full custody of our daughter.”

A beat passed as Katniss absorbed the information. “I see.”

“The court dates were often changed at the last minute. I needed a lot of time off.”

“Of course,” Katniss said.

“Your predecessor, Mr. Crane, didn’t care one way or another about my schedule as long as I completed my work.”

“So you never discussed it with him,” she said.

“No. And I didn’t feel comfortable discussing it with you.” He still didn’t, honestly, but this seemed like his only option.

Peeta chanced a glance up. Katniss’s eyes were fixed on the green stapler on her desk. Her expression was all wrong. Instead of cool indifference or even anger, she looked concerned.

“My daughter hasn’t taken the past few months well, as you can imagine.”

“How old is she?”

“She just turned six.” Peeta sat up straighter, but Katniss didn’t make eye contact. “She’s been dealing with a lot of anxiety, which is why I’ve been leaving the office early. She gets upset at school, and I pick her up.”

Silence stretched between them. Peeta assumed Katniss was judging him as either an incompetent father or an overindulgent one.

“I know I can’t keep pulling her out of school, but for now, I need her to know that I’ll come if she needs me. No matter what.”

Something truly miraculous happened next. Katniss smiled. It was a small smile, barely an upturn of her mouth, but it transformed her entire face. She looked softer, younger. More importantly, she looked like she understood.

He had a feeling that he could stop now, and she’d let him go, but it felt good to explain the situation to a neutral party. Finnick, Madge, and Delly would tell him he was making the right decisions no matter what. Katniss wouldn’t humor him.

“I’m taking her to her first therapy appointment on Wednesday. Usually you have to make it weeks in advance, but they managed to squeeze her in.”

“That’s great, Peeta.” Katniss cleared her throat and smoothed her blouse even though it was already free of wrinkles. “Perhaps we can compromise. I do need you to complete your current projects, but I would never ask you to choose between work and your daughter.”

Peeta nodded as he tried to hide his surprise. Katniss seemed exactly like the kind of person who would ask such a thing.

“I appreciate that.”

“Why don’t you bring your daughter back here?” Katniss suggested. “Get some work done today. Then, you can take off next Wednesday afternoon.”

“You want me to bring her here?”

“You can use my office. It’ll give her room to move around.”

Katniss was already standing and collecting her things before Peeta found his voice.

“Are you serious?”

“Unless you’re not comfortable having her here?”

“No, that’s not--” He stopped. He didn’t want to explain that her offer had surprised him because he believed her to be a cold, callous person who valued work above all else. Somehow, he doubted that’d go over well. “I just don’t want to put you out.”

“I can work at your desk,” she said as she gathered a pile of files. “It’s not a problem.”

Who was this person? Not only had she been completely understanding, but she also seemed eager to help.

“I--I’m going to go pick her up.”

“Okay,” Katniss said without looking up from the files she sorted.

Peeta hesitated before nodding once and exiting the office.

Finnick looked up as Peeta grabbed his coat off the back of his chair.

“Everything okay?” Finnick asked.

“I have no idea what just happened,” Peeta said as he tugged on his coat. Without further explanation, he turned the corner and hurried toward the elevator.

*

By the time Peeta returned to the office, Paige’s tears had dried and she no longer felt sick to her stomach.

“Well hey there, Miss Paige,” Finnick said, his wide eyes sliding from her face to Peeta’s. He cocked his head to the side in question, but Peeta shook his head.

“Hi,” she said quietly, clinging to her father’s leg.

“Paige!” Madge and Delly both waved, which she reluctantly returned.

“Paige is going to hang out here for the afternoon.” Peeta stuck a flash drive into the computer and began loading it with files.

“You need me to grab an extra chair?” Finnick asked, already on his feet. “I’m sure the meeting room on twelfth won’t miss it.”

“Actually, that won’t be necessary. We’re going to work in Ms. Everdeen’s office.”

“Elsa?” Finnick blurted out.

Paige, who knew Elsa only as the queen from Frozen, blinked up at him.

“Ms. Everdeen,” Peeta corrected as he ejected the flash drive. “We’ll be in her office, and she’ll be at my desk.”

“Oh.” Finnick deflated. “Super.”

“C’mon, sweetheart,” Peeta said, leading Paige down the aisle. The rest of his co-workers greeted Paige with smiles and welcomes, but she only waved quietly back.

Katniss was hunched over her desk, her back to the open door when Peeta and Paige came in. Peeta handed Paige her backpack.

“Why don’t you put that on the couch?” he said.

Katniss turned around at the sound of his voice. The smile she wore disappeared as her gaze landed on the back of Paige’s head.

“Ms. Everdeen, this is my daughter, Paige.”

Katniss stared, lips parted, her expression blank until Paige returned to her father’s side.

“Ms. Everdeen?” Peeta prompted.

“Hi!” Katniss blurted out. “I’m sorry. It’s just...she looks so much like you.” She gestured between the two of them. While both were blonde and blue-eyed, Peeta had always thought Paige took after her mother.

“Paige, this is my boss, Ms. Everdeen.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Katniss said, taking a step closer. “I really like your hair.”

Paige grabbed one of the blonde braids that hung over her shoulders and frowned down at it. “Daddy did them,” Paige said. “But he made them too loose. They got messed up at school.”

Peeta tugged on her other braid. “I’m getting better. I just need more practice.”

“Do you want me to fix them for you?” Katniss asked.

Peeta’s mouth fell open, but Katniss didn’t notice. Her focus was completely on Paige.

“Do you know how to braid?” Paige asked.

“I do,” Katniss said.

“Can you do a French braid?”

Katniss nodded. “Come sit down.”

Paige settled onto the couch sideways, folding her legs in front of her.

“You don’t have to do that,” Peeta said.

While Katniss didn’t seem like the type of person to do something she didn’t want to, he still worried. Not only had he forced her out of her office, but he was now eating into her time. It didn’t matter that she had volunteered both.

“I’ll just take an early lunch break,” Katniss said as she pulled out a small brush from her purse.

“I just don’t want to keep you.”

Katniss’s hand froze halfway to Paige’s hair. “I’m sorry.  You’re right. I’m overstepping.”

“Wait. That’s not what I meant. Just ignore me.”

Katniss bit her lip. He had never seen her look anything but one hundred percent certain of herself.

“Are you sure?” she asked.

“Yes. Please fix the disaster I braided into my daughter’s hair.”

“It’s not a disaster, Daddy,” Paige said.

“Give yourself a little credit. This is pretty good.” Katniss pulled the two elastics out of Paige’s hair before carefully unraveling her braids.

Peeta sat behind Katniss’s desk and watched as she brushed Paige’s hair with a gentle hand. He stuck the flash drive into the computer, but his gaze wandered back to the couch before he could open a single file.

He had to get some work done. He had to show Katniss he could balance his personal life with work. But then Katniss asked a question.

“What grade are you in?”

“First,” Paige replied.

“Do you get homework in first grade?”

“Yeah.”

“What kind?”

There wasn’t much substance to the conversation, but it was still a conversation. Paige had been so quiet since her mother had moved out. She always answered Peeta’s questions, but she wasn’t her usual chatty self. Typically, when he arrived home from work, she’d throw herself into his arms and talk his ear off about her day at school.

Her teacher had mentioned how withdrawn she’d become, how she no longer raised her hand or played with her friends.

But here she was having a quiet conversation with an adult she had never met before. Maybe it was easier for Paige to speak when she didn’t have to look at the other person, or maybe she realized how rude it would be to remain silent while Katniss did her hair.

Either way, this day was getting stranger.

A couple of minutes later, Peeta still hadn’t made a single edit in Photoshop, but Katniss had finished Paige’s braid.

“There,” Katniss said softly. “All done.”

Paige slipped off the couch and stood in front of her father. “How does it look?”

“Gorgeous,” Peeta said. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and shot Katniss an apologetic look before snapping a picture.

Paige leaned in close to see. “Wow!” she said. “You’re really good.”

“I’ve had a lot of practice,” Katniss said as she stood and slipped her purse over her shoulder.

Her comment surprised Peeta. He had never seen her hair in any sort of braid before. Most of the time it was pulled back in a low, sleek ponytail. Other times, she wore it in a bun, not a hair out of place.

For the first time, Peeta wondered if Katniss had children or siblings. There were no family pictures in her office, and she usually arrived earlier and stayed later than everyone else. If she had family, she didn’t see them much.

“Thank you. Can I do your hair now?” Paige asked.

Katniss opened her mouth, but Peeta spoke first. “Ms. Everdeen has a lot of work to do. We shouldn’t keep her.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“It was very nice to meet you, Paige,” Katniss said. Even though she wore a skirt and heels, she crouched down so she was eye level with Paige and held out her hand. Paige grasped it with her own and they shook.

“It was very nice to meet you too, Miss Everdeen.”

Peeta beamed, proud of his daughter’s good manners.

“Please, call me Katniss.”

Peeta did a double take, but Katniss didn’t notice. She was already out the door.

*

When Peeta and Paige emerged a little after five, he found half the office gone, including Katniss.

“She left for a conference call an hour ago,” Finnick said, shrugging on his coat. “She said she didn’t want to disturb us with all the tedium.”

Peeta’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Did she actually make a joke?”

“I think she did,” Finnick said. “You know, I thought it was going to be a nightmare having her out here with us, but it was fine. Just quieter than usual. She even accepted a Hershey kiss from Delly.”

After Finnick switched off his computer monitor, he followed Peeta and Paige to the elevator.

“You going to explain what all this was today?” Finnick asked.

“What do you mean?”

The trio walked onto the elevator. Finnick hit the button for the Lobby. “You went from being in some sort of trouble to hijacking her office for an afternoon.”

Peeta didn’t want to go into too much detail with Paige standing at his side, so he simply shrugged. “We compromised.”

“Are you sure that’s all you did?” Finnick asked. “Because before she left, she told me to have a good evening.”

“Miss Katniss did my hair,” Paige said. “She’s really good at braiding.”

Finnick’s eyes widened as he studied Paige’s hair. “She, uh, did a good job.”

“Yeah,” Paige said. “She’s really nice.”

For once, Finnick didn’t have a single thing to say.

*

The next day, Peeta stepped off the elevator balancing three trays of cookies Paige had helped him bake the night before.

The company had already thrown their official holiday party. It had been a stuffy affair held in the ballroom of a hotel down the street. Peeta hadn’t attended as he hadn’t wanted to bother his sister-in-law, Hailey, who served as Paige’s unofficial babysitter. Hailey swore she didn’t mind watching Paige, but Peeta still felt guilty. As a Registered Nurse in the Emergency Room at Panem Memorial, Hailey had a crazy work schedule. There was no way Peeta was going to ask her to watch Paige after a twelve-hour shift just so he could wear an uncomfortable suit and mingle with people he barely knew.

Turns out, he didn’t miss much as he got a summary from Finnick the next day: “Absolutely awful. Terribly boring. But the booze was free.”

Individual departments had their own parties if they wanted, which Peeta’s had done for the past few years. He had worried Katniss would disapprove even though the party was after-hours and offsite, but she never commented on it. Even after Delly invited her - which Finnick had begged her not to do - and Katniss had politely declined, she said nothing more about it.

Delly was holding the potluck-slash-booze fest at her apartment a couple of hours after work, so he decided to bring the cookies in now. She could cart them home and serve them later.

“Peeta, no!” Madge frowned at him from her desk. “You’re not coming tonight, are you?”

“No sitter,” Peeta said. He didn’t want to bother Hailey, and he was reluctant to leave Paige with someone he didn’t know. Eventually, when the custody issue was settled and his divorce was finalized, Peeta would look for a sitter outside of his family. But for now, he just couldn’t leave Paige with a stranger.

“You suck!” Finnick called as Peeta disappeared into the breakroom.

Peeta nearly stopped in the doorway when he saw Katniss leaning against the counter, stirring a mug of coffee as she stared into the distance. He quickly recovered and set the trays down beside her.

“Good morning, Ms. Everdeen.”

She startled at the sound of his voice. “Good morning, Mr. Mellark,” she replied. “Is it someone’s birthday?”

“No, these are cookies for, uh, tonight’s Christmas party.” He didn’t know why he was so reluctant to mention it around her. It wasn’t as if Katniss could stop them from having it.

“I thought Ms. Cartwright was hosting.”

“She is, but I can’t make it, and I’m in charge of dessert.”

“Can’t have a party without dessert.” She took a sip of her coffee.

Peeta thought he caught a small smile hidden behind her mug, but he couldn’t be sure.

Katniss was in her typical professional attire: pencil skirt, matching blazer, a white collared shirt peeking out from underneath. Her hair was pulled back into its usual ponytail. Despite all this, she seemed a little more approachable today, a little warmer.

Instead of hightailing it out of there as he would have any other day, he offered her a cookie.

“A cookie?” she echoed.

“Yeah. I’ve got peanut butter blossoms, chocolate chip, and sugar cookies.”

Without waiting for her response, he opened the top tray. He almost grabbed a Christmas tree-shaped sugar cookie before he remembered her dislike for the holiday. Instead he grabbed a star, decorated with red and green icing.

“You made these?” she asked, peeking at the assortment over his shoulder.

“Yeah. Paige and I had a baking party last night.”

He grabbed a paper towel off the counter and wrapped the cookie in it.

“I shouldn’t,” she said as he tried to hand it to her. “They’re for the party.”

“But you can’t go,” he reminded her. “You should get at least one.”

“Thank you.”

He was surprised by the sincerity in her voice. She sounded genuinely appreciative as if he had presented her with a very thoughtful gift.

“What about you?” she asked.

He grinned. “Don’t worry. There’s a plate at home for Paige and I to share.”

“No, I mean the party. If you don’t mind my asking, why can’t you attend?”

“Oh.” His smile faded. “No sitter.”

“That’s unfortunate. You weren’t able to attend the company’s party either.”

“It’s no big deal.”

“I guess.” Her mouth twisted with doubt. “You seem stressed. You could probably use a fun evening with your friends.”

“You too,” he said without thinking.

Her eyebrows shot up. He braced himself for a reprimand, but she didn’t deliver one. “I don’t have any children,” she said. “My nights are quiet.”

That was one mystery about her solved. He shrugged. “It’s just drinking and listening to Christmas music for a few hours.”

“I’m sure it’s more than that. I could…” She stopped, as if reconsidering whatever she was going to say. She glanced at the closed door. “I could watch Paige for you.”

If he had thought Katniss couldn’t surprise him more than she had yesterday, he was sorely mistaken. There was no way he had heard her correctly.

“You could...watch Paige?”

“I have a lot of experience watching children,” she said. “I can cook, I’m CPR-certified, and I could come to you.”

“I…”

While Katniss’s offer was completely unexpected, he was more surprised that he was considering it. She had gotten along with Paige so well yesterday. And she certainly wasn’t a stranger.

“I’m sorry.” Katniss dumped the remainder of her coffee into the sink and rinsed out her mug. “That was inappropriate. I just wanted…” She shook her head and put her mug into the dish rack to dry.

“No, I was just...surprised,” Peeta finally said. It was the word of the day. “I figured you were busy since you couldn’t come to the party.”

“Oh. No, I don’t have plans, but I know the invite was just a courtesy. No one really wants their boss at a party.”

Peeta almost contradicted her, but he decided there was no point. Katniss would never believe him. More importantly though, she didn’t seem hurt by it. It was just another fact of life to her.

If Peeta hadn’t seen her with Paige the day before, there was no way he would consider this. But Katniss was experienced, and he didn’t doubt she was responsible. And Paige had asked about her before going to bed last night…

“You really don’t mind?” He wanted to ask her again. Maybe twice more. He couldn’t believe this was really happening.

“Definitely not. What time should I be over?”

“Six-thirty would be great,” he said. “Paige will already have had dinner and be in her pajamas. Bedtime is eight-thirty.”

“Okay. I can do that.”

“I’ll be home by eleven. Earlier if you need me to.”

This time there was no hesitation in her smile. “You don’t have to rush home. I’ll bring a book.”

“I have Netflix,” he blurted out.

“Even better.”

He rattled off his address, and she nodded.

“I’ll see you tonight,” she said.

As he watched her leave the kitchen, he thought about how her words, when considered out of context, sounded like the promise of a date.

*

Paige didn’t take the news of Peeta’s plans to go out very well, but she brightened at the identity of her babysitter.

“Do you think she’ll braid my hair again?”

“I’m sure if you ask nicely, she will,” Peeta said.

Paige considered this.

“I’ll have my phone with me.” He wanted to reassure her that he would come home if she needed him without encouraging her to call. She had to get better at being away from him. It was a hard balance to maintain.

Finally, she nodded. “Okay.”

Peeta’s doorbell rang at exactly 6:25. Of course Katniss was early. He swung open the door to find someone much younger - and shorter - than the Ms. Everdeen he worked with. It wasn’t as if he expected Katniss to show up in her skirt and blazer, but he had never imagined her wearing anything else. He couldn’t.

But here she was dressed in skinny jeans and a plain green sweater. Her hair was braided and hanging over her right shoulder. He couldn’t believe how much younger she looked, how much softer. This was a woman he would approach in a bar, a woman he could hold a conversation with. He had always thought Katniss was beautiful, but it was more in an objective way. She was beautiful, sure, but she was also a pain-in-the-ass.

Tonight though, he forgot about the frustration and anger. Tonight she wasn’t Ms. Everdeen. She was just Katniss.

“You’re shorter,” he blurted out.

There was that smile again. Wide and unguarded. “I wear heels at work.”

Right. Of course. He knew that. He had just never considered what she looked like out of them.

He gave Katniss a tour of the downstairs, Paige joining them as they walked through the living room. Katniss lingered in front of the pictures on the wall, a combination of photos of Paige and paintings Peeta had completed over the years. She didn’t ask or comment on them, although he could tell she wanted to by the way her gaze kept drifting back to them. He knew it was the rules she lived her life by that kept her from asking. She was overly concerned with coming off as rude or inappropriate, which is why this entire night felt so surreal. She didn’t want to overstep, yet here she was, in his house, babysitting his daughter.

“Can I show you my room?” Paige asked when they reached the kitchen.

“Sure.”

Katniss followed Paige upstairs. A couple of moments later, he heard laughter. He wanted to follow them, find out what was so funny, what had managed to crack not only Katniss’s serious exterior but Paige’s as well, but he didn’t want to interrupt.

After they returned to the kitchen, Peeta took Paige aside and asked once more if she was comfortable staying home with Katniss. The stress of the last few months had turned him into a worrier. He wondered if Paige could sense it, if her anxiety was his fault.

“It’s okay,” Paige said. “Miss Katniss said we could watch a movie if it was alright with you.”

“Of course,” Peeta said. “Bedtime at eight-thirty. Don’t eat too many cookies.”

Paige nodded.

“Why don’t you get two glasses of milk for you and Katniss while I talk to her?”

As Paige disappeared back into the kitchen, he gestured for Katniss to come into the living room.

“So you’re sure you don’t mind doing this?” he asked.

“Peeta, I’m already here. I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to actually do it.”

She had called him Peeta again. He liked his first name on her lips.

“But I do need your phone number,” she said. “Just in case I need to reach you.”

She stored his number in her phone after he recited it. “Do you have a landline?” she asked.

When he shook his head, she looked back down at her cell phone. “I’ll send you a text, so you have my number too.”

His phone buzzed, and he pulled it out to find a simple “Hello” from an unknown number. He added her to his contacts, debating whether or not to list her as Ms. Everdeen. Finally, he just typed in her full name.

“I’ll be back by eleven,” he promised.

She shrugged. “Take your time. Paige and I will be fine.”

*

Finnick threw his hands in the air as Peeta followed Delly into the living room. “You made it!”

Peeta grinned at his friends as Madge handed him a hard cider.

“You found a sitter?” Madge asked.

Peeta took a long drink as he considered what to say. Katniss hadn’t mentioned anything about keeping her actions a secret, but he doubted she wanted others to know. She was so careful about keeping her personal life separate from her work life.

“Hailey,” Peeta finally said. “She insisted I go out and have some fun.”

“Your sister-in-law is amazing,” Finnick said.

“I know,” Peeta agreed. “Now where are you hiding all the food?”

Delly laughed and led him into the kitchen.

*

When Peeta left at ten-fifteen, the party showed no sign of slowing down. Everyone was stressed out for one reason or another. They all needed an outlet. Finnick, Delly, and Madge begged him to stay, but he had to get home. While the party had worked wonders for his anxiety, he couldn’t keep reality out forever.

He walked into his house at 10:30 to find Katniss curled under a throw blanket on the couch watching the Hallmark channel.

“You do like Christmas,” he said without thinking.

Katniss leaned back against the couch cushion, her head tilted up so she could see him. “I never said I didn’t.”

Peeta racked his brain, trying to come up with a specific example of her dislike for the holiday, but came up empty. It was just the vibe she gave off.

“I told you that you didn’t have to hurry home,” she said as he sat down beside her. Well, almost beside her. He left a respectable gap at least a foot wide between them.

“I know. I just didn’t want to take advantage.”

“You didn’t. I had fun with Paige. She even talked me into letting her stay up until nine.”

Peeta’s eyes widened. “You broke a rule?”

Katniss stood and folded the blanket. “The babysitter always extends bedtime. And gives an extra cookie. That’s why they’re the babysitter and not the parent.” She draped the blanket over the back of the couch. “So really, I was just following a different set of rules.”

Peeta laughed. “Well, thank you for telling me. I’ll need to know these things when I finally find a permanent babysitter for Paige.”

“Until then, I don’t mind watching her.” Katniss rolled her eyes. “Stop looking so surprised.”

“Can you blame me? How many people turn to their boss for child care?”

Katniss sat back down and stared at her lap. “I’m just trying to be helpful. Paige is sweet, and you’re...a really good employee.”

“Thanks.”

“I...I don’t want to bring up anything uncomfortable. And you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to, but...Paige talked to me about your ex-wife.”

Everything good about that night disappeared. The food and alcohol which had tasted so good going down suddenly curdled in his stomach.

“She did?”

“She told me some very personal things, and I didn’t think it was right to keep that from you,” Katniss said.

He buried his face in his hands, hoping not having to look at Katniss would make this easier. Could Paige have told her everything that had happened? It wasn’t a secret, or it wasn’t supposed to be, but Peeta had never told his friends the complete truth. Paige refused to talk about it. Peeta worried what it would do to her to keep it all inside, but he didn’t push her even when the Department of Children, Youth, and Families had interviewed her. He wanted her to talk to someone, but he had never expected that Katniss would be the person she opened up to.

“What did she say?” he asked.

“She thinks everything is her fault. Your ex-wife moving out, the divorce, your stress...she’s afraid you’re mad at her.”

His heart plummeted, landing in the swirling mess of acid eating away at his stomach. His worst possible fear had come true, and of course, Ms. Everdeen, the source of his stress at work, had to be the messenger.

“But I told her…” Peeta stood and hurried into the kitchen, worried that if he didn’t move right away, he’d be sick on the living room floor.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to upset you.”

Peeta spun around at the sound of Katniss’s voice to find her standing in the entrance of the kitchen.

“I told her I wasn’t mad. I told her it wasn’t her fault. I’ve said it so many times,” Peeta said.

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay!” Peeta slammed his fist on the counter. Katniss jumped, and he immediately regretted his actions. He had to keep his temper under control. He had to stop acting like his mother, like Glimmer...he was better than this.

“That night we spent at the hotel, I told her what her mother did was wrong. That she didn’t deserve to be insulted or hit or…” Peeta trailed off.

He had tried so hard to avoid becoming his mother that he hadn’t noticed he’d married a woman just like her. He’d never forget the night he came home early from work to find Glimmer screaming at Paige over a spilled cup of juice. He’d never forget the the sight of Glimmer pulling her hand back or the sound it made when her palm connected with Paige’s face.

How long had it been like that? How could he not have noticed?

He had very nearly grabbed Glimmer and thrown her across the room. He wanted to rage and yell and hurt her the same way, but Paige’s tears had stopped him. He couldn’t fight Glimmer’s violence with violence of his own. He picked up Paige, told Glimmer she had twenty-four hours to move her stuff out of the house, and spent the night at a hotel in the next town over.

“You did the right thing,” Katniss said. “It sounds like you’ve done all the right things.”

Peeta shook his head. “I let it happen. How could I not have known?”

“It doesn’t matter that you didn’t see it at first. You can’t change that. Abusers are good at hiding their true colors. What matters is that you took immediate action. You didn’t make excuses. You didn’t give her another chance to hurt Paige.”

He stared at Katniss for a long moment. Katniss wouldn’t lie to him. She wasn’t in the habit of softening a blow or holding back. He had seen how blunt she could be at work. He let out a shuddering breath and tried to absorb her words.

“Once all of this is over, and you have sole custody, things will get back to normal. Paige will get better,” Katniss continued.

“Thank you.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry too. I know you try to keep your distance and now...”

“It’s okay.” She fiddled with her braid and looked down at her feet. “I should probably get going.”

“You don’t have to.” He didn’t want to be alone, cycling through thoughts of shame and guilt for the rest of the night. Her hesitation suggested she might not want to leave either. “Weren’t you watching a movie?”

“Yeah. Who knows how it’ll end? Hallmark can be so unpredictable.”

He laughed. For the longest time, he had assumed Katniss didn’t possess a sense of humor. As it turned out, she had just been hiding that dry sarcasm.

They settled back on the couch. The silence between them wasn’t exactly tense, but it wasn’t an easy, relaxing one either.

“It’s not that I don’t care,” Katniss said as the movie cut to commercial.

“About what?”

“About you and...everyone else at work. I know everyone thinks I’m some sort of ice queen who doesn’t care, but...I do.”

Peeta turned at least three different shades of red. Was it possible she knew about their nickname for her? Her use of “ice queen” was way too coincidental otherwise. “I don’t think that.”

“Don’t lie. It’s okay.” She clasped her hands together in her lap. “I just have trouble connecting with people. Part of me doesn’t want to.”

“Why?”

“It’s just easier.”

At first he thought the conversation was over. Her terse answer didn’t invite a follow up question. Tension had sprouted between them, and he knew the topic of conversation was the cause. The commercial break ended, they both stared at the television, but after another moment, she spoke.

“I’ve been alone for a long time. I’m not sure I remember how to not be alone.”

“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to,” he said.

“No, I want to.” She brushed her braid off her shoulder before settling her hands back in her lap. They were clasped together so tightly, her knuckles were white. “My dad died when I was eleven, and my sister...she was killed by a drunk driver over winter break her senior year of high school.”

“Katniss, I...I’m so sorry.” Without thinking, he laid his hand over hers and squeezed.

“It was hard after my father died. I did everything I could to make sure Prim was happy, that she never wanted for anything. I did odd jobs around my neighborhood, and when I finally turned fifteen, I found a job at the grocery store. When I graduated from high school, I got a secretary position at Abernathy’s.”  

Peeta didn’t know what to say. He had no idea Katniss had been with the company for so long. If she had started as a secretary and worked her way up to a managerial position, she was obviously smart and capable. She had to know what she was doing.

“I saved every cent I could to make sure Prim could go to whatever college she wanted,” Katniss continued. “She wanted to be a doctor.”

And then she had died a few months shy of her high school graduation. Imagining Katniss’s loss cracked his chest open. He tried to make it real, imagine it as one of his brothers, but he couldn’t. It was unfathomable.

“It was all for nothing in the end,” Katniss said. “A college fund for no one.”

He wanted to pull her into his arms. He knew whatever he said right now wouldn’t help. But he doubted Katniss would allow it.

“After she died, I just kept working and saving. I don’t know how to do anything else.”

Katniss was stuck in survival mode. It sounded as if she had been there since her father’s death, and had never found her way out. Her grief was a labyrinth, and while he couldn’t relate to her specific tragedies, he knew what it was to forget how to live. To wander the maze with no hope of escape, just the drive to go around one more corner, make it through one more day.

A tear slipped down Katniss’s cheek. She practically slapped herself in her haste to wipe it away.

“I shouldn’t have told you all that,” she said.

“I’m glad you did.”

She shook her head. “Can I tell you something else then? Something I shouldn’t and clearly makes me a terrible boss?”

Peeta’s heart rate rose as he realized how close the two of them now were. His hand still rested on hers.

“Mr. Abernathy is considering layoffs in the new year,” she said.

Peeta blinked in surprise. At first, he felt ashamed that he had hoped Katniss would confess something else, but it quickly changed to shock. “Layoffs?”

“It’s why I’ve been so hard on everyone. Why I want to open the day after Christmas. You’re all hard-working, talented employees. I don’t want to give Mr. Abernathy a reason to doubt your dedication.”

Peeta sat back and covered his face. He wanted to laugh. He could feel it bubbling up in his throat.

“I can’t believe this,” he said.

“I’m sorry,” Katniss said. “I know I shouldn’t have said anything. I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s holiday. I just wanted you to understand.”

“We were so wrong about you,” Peeta said.

“I don’t know,” Katniss said with a small smile. “The nickname Elsa sort of fits.”

“Oh my god.” He dropped his hands. “You know about that?”

“I’m not an idiot.”

“I am so sorry. You just, you seemed so…”

She shrugged. “Usually I don’t care what people think about me. But I guess I just wanted you to know that I’m not as bad as you think.”

He couldn’t tell if there was a deeper meaning to her confession. Out of all the employees in the office, she specifically wanted him to know she was a real live person with real live feelings? Or had she confessed because he was the only one she had ever seen outside of the office?

It didn't matter. Or it couldn’t, at least not right now. Tears were still drying on her face, but at least she was smiling.

“I have to ask you then...why didn’t you lessen Finnick’s workload when he told you about his wife?”

Katniss’s smile immediately disappeared. “What about his wife?”

Shit. “You mean, he didn’t explain why he was feeling so stressed out?”

“No. He said he felt overwhelmed, and was hoping to give one of his projects to someone else. I thought he was trying to get out of doing work. I had no idea something else was going on.”

“I thought he told you.”

Katniss rubbed her forehead, her mouth twisted in a scowl. “It doesn’t matter that he didn’t. He felt stressed out, and I dismissed him. I knew I shouldn’t have listened to Seneca.”

“Mr. Crane?” Peeta asked.

“He warned me about Finnick before I took over. Told me he liked to slack off. I shouldn’t have listened. I should have waited and formed my own opinion.” She met Peeta’s eyes. “I’ll fix it. I promise.”

“You’re too hard on yourself. Everything will be fine.”

“And you’re way too optimistic.” She glanced at the cable box beneath the television and sighed. “I should get going before I tell you anything else I regret.”

“Hey.” He touched her arm. “I don’t regret what you know about me now. I’m glad Paige found someone to open up to.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. So you shouldn’t regret it either. It’s good to get out of your own head every once in a while.”

She smiled, and once more, his pulse raced. He couldn’t decide if this attraction to Katniss had been there all along, buried beneath the stress she caused, or if it had developed over the evening as the real Katniss came into focus.

He walked her to the door and thanked her once more for watching Paige. And then before he could change his mind, he blurted out, “You should come over Sunday night. For dinner.”

Her eyes widened “On Christmas Eve? Are you sure that’s--”

“Don’t say appropriate.”

“I don’t want to intrude on your time with your daughter.”

“Are you kidding? Paige would be thrilled if you joined us.”

“Is this a pity invite? Because you know I’ll be alone?”

He shook his head. “Sorry. No pity invites here.”

She bit her lip. “What’s the dress code?”

He suppressed a laugh, but he was sure she could see the amusement on his face. “How about you dress to your comfort, and I’ll dress up or down accordingly?”

“Okay.”

“Come for six?”

“Okay,” she repeated. “I’m going to leave before I realize this is a terrible idea and change my mind.”

“Better hurry,” he said. “I’ll let you know how that Hallmark movie ends.”

*

While Peeta failed to talk to Paige about what she said to Katniss, he succeeded in telling his daughter that Katniss was coming to dinner.

She was, to put it mildly, excited. “She is so cool, Dad! We watched Tangled, and it turns out Rapunzel is her favorite princess too! She said she could give me Rapunzel hair.”

While Peeta had no idea what Paige meant by “Rapunzel hair,” he did learn a lot about Katniss thanks to his daughter. For example, Katniss loved to read and had been thrilled to read a chapter of Charlotte’s Web to Paige before bed. She practiced yoga regularly and had shown Paige a few poses. And, most importantly, her favorite kind of pie was apple, and therefore, it was on the menu for tonight.

Two minutes before six, the doorbell rang. As soon as Peeta opened the door, Katniss thrust a bottle of wine at him.

“I picked this up, and then I realized I have no idea if you even like wine.” She pulled a box of green tea out of her purse and pushed it into his free hand. “But I know you like tea, so I have backup.”

He was surprised to find the tea she had purchased matched the kind he kept at work. Apparently, without him noticing, she had been paying attention.

“You’re in luck. I enjoy both wine and tea. Come on in,” he said.

He moved aside, giving her room to step over the threshold. He was lucky his hands were full because instinct had him reaching for the small of her back to guide her. He shut the door, and they both went into the kitchen.

“Can I get you something to drink?” he asked.

“Water’s fine. Thank you.”

As he grabbed a glass from the cabinet, he felt the distance between them, the easy familiarity of the other night gone. He worried they wouldn’t be able to recreate it until Katniss held out her arms.

“I settled on a sweater dress and tights. Not fancy, but not too casual. What do you think?” she asked.

He glanced down at his dark blue jeans and red sweater and nodded his approval. “I think I don’t have to change. I did have a suit hanging in my closet just in case.”

“What would you have done if I had shown up in my pajamas?”

“I would have left you standing on the doorstep while I ran to change into sweatpants.”

“Alright. Next time it’s sweatpants.”

She turned away and took a sip of her water, missing the look of shock on his face. Next time. There was going to be a next time.

Katniss pulled a set of flower clips from her purse. “Is Paige upstairs?”

“Yeah.” He eyed the clips. “What are those?”

“I told her next time I saw her, I’d make her look like Rapunzel, which means lots of flowers.”

An unexpected warmth filled him as he studied Katniss. She appeared genuinely excited.

“You didn’t have to do that,” he said.

“It’s fun doing someone’s hair again.” She swept past him and disappeared up the stairs.

Her sister. Of course. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t realized it before. Katniss had a talent for braiding and watching children because she had done so much for her younger sister.

When Katniss and Paige came down fifteen minutes later, Paige wore her Rapunzel dress, her hair in a long braid down her back with at least a dozen flowers decorating it. She and Katniss looked so happy, it made Peeta’s chest ache.

“Ready for dinner?” he asked.

*

Peeta decided not to enforce Paige’s bedtime, knowing she’d fall asleep eventually. Halfway through the live action version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas, she passed out in Peeta’s lap. Katniss carefully plucked the flower clips out of Paige’s hair before Peeta picked her up and deposited her in bed.

When he returned to the couch, he sat a little closer to Katniss. Not enough to touch her or make her uncomfortable. Just a little closer.

“Thank you for dinner tonight,” she said. “The apple pie was delicious.”

“You have Paige to thank for that.”

“You even remembered the vanilla ice cream.” She finished the small amount of wine remaining in her glass and looked over at him. “I guess I should go?”

He liked that she posed it as a question, that she hadn’t bothered to stand up or pull on her boots.

“If you go now, you’ll miss the best part,” he said.

“Something better than delicious food and good company?”

“Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

A moment after he disappeared down the hall into his home office, he reappeared with two Santa hats. He threw one to Katniss before tugging the other onto his head.

“What’s this?” she asked.

“Are you ready for elf duty?”

Her eyes lit up. “You mean put out presents for Paige?”

“We also have to eat the cookies she left out. If you’re up to the task.”

Katniss stood up and pulled the hat on. “Lead the way.”

A week ago, if someone had told Peeta that Ms. Everdeen, his rigid, overly serious boss would be in his house helping him place gifts around the Christmas tree, he would have doubled over in laughter. But this woman next to him, this sweet, thoughtful, beautiful woman was nothing like the Ms. Everdeen he knew. He recognized traces of her. There was an intense focus on her face as she arranged the gifts, and despite the confessions they had shared with each other, she still hadn’t asked him about the art on his walls.

But there was warmth in her expression now, and her smiles came so easily. He could tease her without worry of reprimand. He could notice how beautiful she was and how good she smelled, and when he touched her hand, he could pretend it was an accident.

After they had carefully arranged the presents, they sat on the floor, the lights dim, wine glasses in hand, and talked. For two hours, Katniss came into sharper focus as whatever walls she usually hid behind crumbled. The blue, red, and green lights from the tree danced across her face as she threw her head back and laughed at the story of Paige’s first encounter with a mall Santa. When she set her wine glass down and looked over at him with bright eyes and flushed cheeks, he couldn’t help but lean closer.

“Has she been back to see Santa since?” Katniss asked.

“Yes, but we never made it this year.”

“No time?”

“No, there was time. Christmas just felt different this year, I guess. Usually, she starts dropping hints about going to see Santa on Thanksgiving, but it didn’t come up this year.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it. You definitely made up for it.” She tilted her head toward the mounds of gifts surrounding the tree.

Peeta laughed. Yeah, guilt had definitely been the driving force behind his purchases this year.

“Thank you for coming over tonight,” he said. “Paige had a lot of fun with you. I don’t think it would have been the same without you.”

Katniss shook her head and looked down at her lap. “I highly doubt that. You two make a wonderful little family.”

“Thanks, but I mean it. It made a difference to me.”

He reached out to touch her hair. When she didn’t move away, he tucked a few strands behind her ear. She swallowed, and he resisted the urge to press his mouth to her throat and trace the movement with his tongue.

“You couldn’t stand me a few days ago,” she said.

“I was an idiot a few days ago,” he replied. “I should have listened to Delly. She kept saying if we just had a conversation with you, we’d realize you weren’t so bad.”

“Is that what I should do then? Start offering child care to all my employees? Crash their holiday dinners?”

“I hope not,” he said. “I kind of thought I was special.”

“You are.” She squeezed her eyes shut. It was hard to tell with the lights so dim, but he thought he saw her blush. “I mean…”

When she didn’t try to explain further, he leaned forward, and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was soft and unsure, but the longer it went on without her pulling away, the bolder he became. He cupped the side of her face, his fingers disappearing into her hair, and sucked on her bottom lip. She grabbed a fistful of his sweater to pull him closer. A moment later, she was on her back, her hips cradling his as he hovered over her.

“Wait.” Her fist flattened into a palm against his chest.

“Please don’t,” he said, his breathing heavy. “Can’t we worry about appropriate later?”

She laughed softly. “I was going to ask if you heard something. I don’t think Paige should come downstairs and find us like this.”

He paused and listened hard, but there was no noise.

“I think we’re okay,” he whispered.

“You’re right though,” she said. “We shouldn’t be doing this.”

“That’s not even close to what I said.”

“There are so many reasons why I should go.”

She was his boss. He was in the middle of a divorce and fighting for full custody. Paige was upstairs. And yet.

“I feel like if you go now, then that’ll be it. It’ll be like this never happened.”

“Maybe that’s for the best,” she said.

“I don’t think that’s true.”

When he kissed her again, there was no hesitation. She wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled him closer. Time slipped away as his hands wandered beneath her dress, and she gasped into his mouth.

“Do you think we should go upstairs?” she asked as he kissed a trail down her neck.

“Are you sure?”

Suddenly, she was Ms. Everdeen again, serious and composed, as she looked him in the eye and said, “I am one hundred percent sure.”

Her footsteps on the stairs were soundless. When they reached his bedroom, he didn’t bother turning on the light.

*

The next morning, he woke up to Paige dive-bombing his bed. He sat up in a panic, unsure how he was going to explain Katniss in bed with him, when he realized there was no Katniss to explain. It was just him, and now Paige jumping up and down. Peeta’s heart sank as he looked around the room, but there was nothing to suggest Katniss had ever been there much less spent the night.

Only a few hours ago, Katniss had curled up in his arms as his eyes fluttered shut, the worry he constantly lived with finally giving him a reprieve. He fell asleep content and calm, the scent of her hair on his skin.

But now...

Peeta finally snapped out of it when Paige jumped into arms.

“I guess you want to open presents?” he asked.

“Presents!” And then she was out of his bedroom, running down the stairs.

Peeta shoved the night before out his mind, buried his disappointment, and went downstairs to celebrate Christmas with his daughter.

*

An hour later, as Paige danced around the living room in her new Rapunzel dress and Peeta cleaned up the discarded wrapping paper, his phone beeped.

It was a text message from Katniss.

I’m sorry to disturb you at home on Christmas, but I wanted to let you all know that after much consideration, I have decided to close our department tomorrow. Please respond, so I know that you received this message. Have a wonderful day off with your families. Merry Christmas.

Peeta nearly sent his phone flying across the room. It wasn’t a group text. She must have sent it to each person individually, and yet his read like any other generic message you sent to an employee you barely knew.

He sent a thumbs up emoji back, shoved his cell phone back into his pocket, and returned to cleaning. He didn’t hear from her for the rest of the day.

*

The next day, after he dropped Paige off at Rye and Hailey’s house so she could celebrate a second Christmas with her cousins, he found himself driving in the direction of the office. It was a bad idea, especially after Katniss’s not so subtle brushoff, but he felt like he had to try. It had only been a few days since he had first seen her outside of the office, but already his feelings for her had grown.

And he knew she felt something for him too.

As expected, she was in her office in the empty department, typing away at her computer when he walked in. She jumped when he knocked on the door, but smiled when she saw it was him.

“Look, I know you don’t want to see me,” he said.

“Why wouldn’t I want to see you?”

Great. This was the way she was going to play this.

“Are we just going to pretend nothing happened?” he asked.

“What are you talking about? Are you okay? You seem upset.”

As usual her tone was calm and quiet, although he detected a hint of worry.

“Can we not have this conversation with you on the other side of that desk?”

“Okay,” she said, brow creased as she walked around to where he was standing. “What’s going on?”

“I get that you regret what happened, but--”

She touched his arm. “What are you talking about? I don’t regret anything. I had an amazing time with you.”

“But you think we should pretend it never happened.”

“Why would I want that? I mean, if this is to continue, we’ll have to be discreet, but--”

“Wait.” He shook his head. “I don’t understand. If you want to keep seeing each other, why did you leave?”

“I wasn’t going to let Paige find me in bed with you! And I certainly wasn’t going to insert myself into Christmas morning with your daughter. Didn’t you read my note?”

“You left a note?”

“Of course! I wouldn’t just leave. I left it on the pillow.”

Peeta thought back to Christmas morning, to Paige jumping on the bed. The note must have flown off. It was probably under the bed or behind his nightstand table.

“I didn’t see it. I didn’t see it, and I’m an idiot,” he said. “You really want to give this a try?”

“Yes.”

“Even though it’s a terrible idea and breaks several rules?” he asked.

She rolled her eyes. “Yes. I don’t follow every single rule, you know.”

“I can see that. You said the department was closed, and yet here you are.”

“I have a lot of work to get done,” she said.

“I hope you’re planning on taking a half day.”

She bit her lip, the only indication she ever gave that she was unsure.

“Come on. You can come over, and I’ll make lunch. Let’s worry about work tomorrow.”

They walked out of the building together, but separate, their conversation generic and unimportant, their arms glued to their sides. They parted ways at the parking lot and climbed into their respective cars.

Twenty minutes later, she was walking through his front door, his hand on the small of her back.

“Is there any apple pie left?” she asked.

“Pie for lunch? I’ve turned you into a rebel.”

He cut two slices, set them on plates, and scooped vanilla ice cream onto each. When he went into the living room to tell her it was ready, he found her staring at the artwork on the walls once more.

This time, she asked him where they had come from, and when she found out that he had done them, she asked how long he had been drawing, what other kind of art he did.

The questions flooded out of her. He was happy to answer each and every one. He led her upstairs to show her his sketchbooks, and she pored over them, admiring each page, complimenting the ones she liked best. When he ran out of sketchbooks, he kissed her instead, and the afternoon drifted away, the ice cream on their pie melting downstairs.

By the time they returned to the kitchen, it was time for dinner, and Peeta was the happiest he had been in months.

For the first time in a very long time, he believed everything really would be okay. He had his daughter, his friends, and his family on his side, helping him through everything.

And now, he had Katniss too.

[hpzen1805]

So, it's been a crazy ride these last few weeks.

Work was geting bad again, my supervisor (who has made a point to tell me that she's my colleague, not my supervisor, despite the fact that she runs the attorney's entire practice and requires that all work product be reviewed by her) started being horrible to me again. And it took this crazy thing and talking it over with my partner to realize that she's been gaslighting me this whole time.

Fun.

Things were getting bad and I was super stressed and not doing well at all (things were like when I started high school; I would wake up feeling sick to my stomach and almost vomit every morning because that's how my body deals with stress. Fun, right?)

But I had this class for work that was out of the office with my old senior paralegal, and it turned out to be just what I needed. She kind of knew what was going on already because she and I keep in contact, but we were able to actually talk about what was going on with both of us. I told her about the craziness at work and she told me how amazing her new office is. She also made a point to tell me that they were hiring and that she had talked me up so well that they wanted to see my resume. I didn't think it was going to go anywhere, but I needed some hope, so I agreed to send it to her.

At the class, I realized just how little these people who supposedly "wanted to teach me" about my field had really been keeping from me. The class went over things that I had been told were too advanced for me so simply that I found out that there was a whole exemption that we were utilizing that I had never been told about and which made the calculations that I had been struggling with make so much more sense. Of course, when I had done those calculations, I had been given a wkrd processing sheet to work with, and no explanation of why each part did what it did or what was supposed to be used to accomplish it. When I was told I did it wrong, the explanation was that "[I] couldn't know that because it comes with experience".

No. It comes from someone actually explaining shit. Just saying.

Anyway, my friend got me an interview, and it went really well. I had an offer within the week, and with how stressed my coworkers' behavior was making me, I was more than happy to accept. However, I still felt like I owed that place some modicum of loyalty (hey, I'd been there for a year and - as ive found out is like all gaslighters - things didn't always seem horrible; sometimes they were nice to me and let me hear them shit-talk others so that I knew what they did behind my back) I felt like I should give a months notice to do right by them.

So I signed my offer letter, gave a months notice, and started working with my non-supervisor to organize the tasks that I had and figure out what I could accomplish before I left.

Weird thing, though: when I gave notice, the attorney wasn't there, and my non-supervisor had always said to tell her first if we were leaving so she could "make things easier with [the boss]", so I did. She was very nice about it and said they would support my decision.

Then she asked where I was going, which I had purposely not said because another former employee worked there and I didn't want to make things weird or give them an opening to try and bad-mouth me (I don't trust people who smile and make polite chit-chat with someone and immediately start talking shit about them the second they leave the room, sorry not sorry). I told her that I didn't want to say because I wanted to avoid any awkward situations. This was her response:

"Why? It'll be more awkward if you're not upfront with us. We need to know in case there's a conflict. If there's a conflict [the boss] will only want you to stay two weeks, but if there isn't, she'll take the whole month. "

I - like a dumbass - was startled into telling her because it sounded legit. Come to find out from my friend at the new place that it was total bullshit, and they were just being nosy. Apparently, when the last girl from our firm left for my new firm, they called to talk to the hiring attorney about her (idk what they said, but my friend basically told me that the attorney knew better than to listen to them).

Anyway, I was ready to stick out the month and blow through my task list as fast as I could. I mean, I was super into it! I wanted to do the best I could because im a firm believer in kill 'em with kindness. Seriously, my motto is "I am a ray of goddamn sunshine and everyone Will Fucking Know It". So when I went in on Tuesday, I was ready to get down to business (to defeat... the tasks? Idk, it's late, and I'm loopy). And my supervisor had seemed like she was really supportive on monday when I told her, so I thought things would go relatively smoothly.

I was so wrong.

I went into our planning meeting, and it was like I was transported back three weeks; every little thing I did or said was scrutinized and found wrong, she was annoyed by all the tasks I had that she had told me to push back, and she decided she wanted to finalize 7 of my tasks that day. Since 5 had been reviewed BY HER before, I was hoping it wouldn't be too bad.

It was.

I had made all the updates that she asked, but she found further fault with the product that she had previously overlooked, and of course, it was my fault. So I tried to fix things and get them done, but by this time, her passive-aggressive attitude and constant sighing to express her "boredom" (something she's explained before as a reaction to "people not doing things the way she wants them done quickly enough"; that's a story for another day) was really fucking with my stress levels. There was also a thing with some documents that I didn't have, which I had asked her about weeks before, and she had said that the client had kept them and we had just kept scans after the meeting; that day, she wanted to know why I didn't have them, and I reminded her of that conversation; she got mad and said that I should have them and started asking when I had last had them (I never had them) and then went to check her office. Lo and behold! They were in her office! Who woulda thunk?! Then she proceeded to tell me that it was my fault for not getting them from her and that she never told me the client kept them becuase they would never keep them (which I had pointed out was weird when we talked about it and she assured me it was a rushed decision and out kf the norm).

Basically, the whole day was a shit-show in a hell-hole with my own personal torturer who specializes in emotional fuckery.

So I went in on Wednesday after almost puking when I woke up. After crying out of frustration to my partner the night before. After talking to my partner and my parents and being told by all of them that I could, in fact, just leave if I wanted to, and that the stuff my supervisor was doing was super shady (forcing me to tell her where I was going to work, and telling me not to tell hr because the boss would want to do it "on her own terms" because of the bad relationship between her practice and the main branch of the firm).

And after all of that, I came in to a rude response to my check-out email (which was in response to a rude reminder that I had to send one "EVERYDAY before I leave") and a passive aggressive note written in all caps on a post it that a new task was an ASAP and that I needed to see her IMMEDIATELY when I finished it.

And I snapped.

I sent an email to hr giving my notice and saying that I didn't want to upset my boss, so if she hadn't sent it over Please dont tell her I did. I got a very concerned response, and an offer to talk if I needed it. I went to themorning meeting with our practice grouo and made polite small talk with my supervisor, who was using the same voice on me that she uses on the associate attorneys that she thinks are stupid and doesn't like, but has to be nice to. And at that point, I was Done.

I went back to the office and finished the ASAP. I finished my admin stuff that had been lingering. I cleaned up my desk and updated my task list. I checked that my shelves were organized. I gathered up any research that I had done that didn't have client names on it, any notes I had without client names, and any personal items I had. And I left.

Well, first I gave her the asap and said I almost threw up (which I had in the midst of organizing) and that I needed to go home. (The response was: "Leave what you have in my box and hand flap to suggest leaving". Because, since she works while sick or giving birth, everyone else is expected to as well, and if you don't, you're weak and beneath her)

Then, I went to hr and explained what had been going on. I was so stressed that I cried again (luckily, not much, cuz I hate crying in front of anyone, but especially in a professional setting), but she was super nice about it and asked what I would like to do. I said that I wanted to cut my notice to the usual two weeks, and use my sick and vacation time to cover that week and a half that I had left. I just couldn't do it anymore, and my partner's voice was in the back of my head "You gave your notice. They can't fire you, and you don't have to take their crap.", along with my mom's voice telling me "The only one stopping you, is you." And the hr lady said I could!

So I left.

And I feel SO MUCH BETTER.

Am I still worried that they'll bad mouth me to my new firm and ruin my reputation with the attorneys at their firm? Yes.

Am I super nervous about starting a new job? Fuck yes, I am.

But I am out of that toxic place, and I have a new opportunity to do the best I can with my life.

And I am so grateful for that. I am so grateful for the people I have in my life. And I'm even grateful for what those people did, because I can learn from it, and I can grow as a person so that I am NEVER LIKE THEM.

So, if you've made it this far, I'm sorry for the rant, but also: Please don't give up. It may seem like you're in a horrible situation, but you CAN find a way out. Talk to people, don't be afraid that you're bothering them. Or do it anyway, because guess what? You Deserve Better. Even if someone (including yourself) is telling you that you don't. You Deserve Better. And if you feel like no one believes in you, or you can't do it? I believe in you. And I know you can do it. If I can, anyone can.

Please, don't give up.

[dubredofanfics]

Hit n Run [BONGLENI]

IV. Rocos Insurances

Two weeks after, Leni received nothing from Rocos Insurances confirming her hiring. She knew she didn't stand a chance to make it. She decided to just continue searching for jobs the next weeks.

"Ate, nakakuha ka ba ng trabaho sa Rocos?" Natalia asked while she was watching the television with her sister.

"Hindi ako pinalad e." She replied with the bad news. "Pero wag ka mag-alala. Makakahanap rin ako ng trabaho tapos mabibili ko na lahat ng gusto mo." She poured in some positive thoughts.

"So kamusta naman pala yung school mo?" Leni asked. "Mmmm. Okay naman po. Wala namang masyadong bago." Natalia replied.

"Ay! Meron pala. May bumisita sa school sabi ng teacher namin isa daw yon sa major donators? Di ko matandaan basta. Ang bait niya. Sabi niya ang talino ko daw and ang cute cute ko daw tapos binigyan niya ako nito." She pulled out her notebook from her bag and showed Leni the three star stamp that she got.

"Wow! Ang galing naman ng little Natalia! Napakatalino at cute mo talaga." She agreed. "Ano bang pangalan nung donator na yan?" She asked.

"Di ko po matandaan e..." Natalia looked so troubled as she struggled to recall his name. "Pero mabait siya tapos pogi. Para ngang bagay po kayo." She teased.

"Ano?" Leni chuckled with the idea.

Her phone rang, she had to attend to the call.

Leni: Hello?

Person: Hello. Good afternoon, is this miss Leni?

Leni: Yes, speaking. Ano pong kailangan nila?

Person: Yes. Hello. This is Michelle from Rocos Insurances. We would like to inform you that you have a scheduled interview for Friday afternoon at 2PM. Are you available at the said time?

Leni panicked and started to hyperventilate with the news she just heard. The lady on line informed her about her interview.

Leni: Yes! Yes. I'm free on Friday po.

Person: Great. So we'll see you on Friday, miss Leni. Thank you.

Leni: Yes. Thank you. Thank you!

She dropped the line a squealed in excitement and happiness.

—

Friday came, Leni prepared herself for the callback at Rocos. She tried not to get bothered about the fact that she is about to see Bongbong Marcos again.

She was asked to go to building C of Rocos for her interview, she had her last interview with Bongbong at Building A.

"Miss Leni?" The assistant called and guided her to the office.

She was a bit relieved not to see Bongbong waiting for her at the boss' table.

"Have a seat." The employer offered. She took a seat and greeted him politely.

"So Leni, right?" He began with a smile. She felt a bit comfortable with him than when she was being interviewed by Bongbong.

"I'm Rodrigo Duterte. Productions and Quality control department board of director." He introduced and shook her hand. "Pleasure to meet you po, sir." She smiled back.

"So... I asked the HR to call you back because there is a job hiring slot for secretary assistant. I heard you were applying for an executive assistant position last time, tama ba?"

"Ah. Yes, sir."

"Yeah. So I was wondering if you're interested in this position?" He asked.

"Ay opo, sir. It would be so fine. I mean, I could work on any position or any related position. I'm grateful po." She replied.

He began to explain to her the purpose of her callback and how he felt the potential in her despite of the fact that she was an undergrad. She threw in some questions for clarifications after his discussion with her.

"Sir, if you don't mind, may i just ask if you are anyway related to Mr. Marcos po?" She asked as she began to feel at ease to ask such questions.

"Bongbong...? Bongbong Marcos?"

"Yes, sir." She confirmed. "Oo. He's the board director of the Strategic Marketing department. Bakit? Do you know him?" He asked.

"Ah hindi po. May interview po kase ako sakanya last time.. Naisip ko lang po if related po ba ito doon..."

"Ah, ininterview ka pala niya last time." He pointed out. "I saw you last time at building A at the elevator area... Pero your callback is not related to your interview with Bongbong. It's another department." He clarified.

She felt more relieved that her hiring is slightly distant and not related to Bongbong.

"Didn't you make it to his department?" He asked. She chuckled. "Hindi po e."

He wasn't very surprised though. "He's one of the most feared board director in this firm. Gina Lopez is his female version. Strikto talaga sila pero sobrang skilled and smart. Don't get too bothered with that." He explained. "You'll be under my department, anyways. I don't like scaring people under my department so... You'll be fine." He chuckled making her feel at ease being hired under him.

"Thank you po, sir. Medyo nabunutan ako ng tinik." She chuckled with him.

He dialed his secretary to come in. "May schedule ba ako ngayong araw?" He asked.

"Uhm... Wala naman po sir. Review lang po para sa project four." She replied. "Okay. Reschedule that tomorrow morning. Thanks." He requested and stood up from his seat.

"Leni." He called and asked her to follow him for her short orientation.

Usually, orientation are administered by other minor employees but Rody has been the nicest board director in Rocos that he prefers orienting the new employees he hired by himself.

He opened the powerpoint and began the orientation by introducing to Leni the bosses of the Rocos.

President (CEO): Fredrick Montgomery Sr.

Executive Vice President (COO): Imee Marcos-Montgomery

Board of Directors:

Bongbong Marcos - Strategic Marketing Director

Gina Lopez - Accounting Director

Rody Duterte - Production Director

Executive Managers:

Martin Romualdez - Sales Manager, QC

Ariella Nicole - Cost Accounting Supervisor

He informed her about the groundbreaking professional achievements and academic background of the big bosses and it just bewildered Leni.

And so on...

Soon then, Leni was informed about the day she can begin to work.

"What can I say? See you next week and welcome to Rocos." Rody gave her a warm welcome before allowing her to go.

—

Leni began to work the following weeks. She managed to adjust and adapt the new workplace with benefit of working under Rody's department. She was able to adjust well since Risa was hired as an executive secretary which Leni is under to and they became good friends.

So far, her performance in the company was satisfactory. She didn't give Rody any reason to regret her hiring.

As much as it was unlikely for Bongbong and Leni to cross paths, it was inevitable not for Bongbong to discover her being part of Rody's department.

—

Bongbong has been trying so hard to pretend that he doesn't give a single damn about Leni but then, there are several instances that he just find himself staring blankly at places and thinking about her. He felt like his ego was being damaged with the thought of her.

"Bongets!" Martin called his attention as he noticed him discreetly staring at Leni from the outside of the conference room through the glass doors. Martin traced his sight and gave him a smirk.

"Hooked ka yata diyan kay hospital girl, huh?" He teased and chuckled. "Huh? Of course not. Anong hook? Tsaka I slept with her already. I don't sleep with the same woman twice." He denied but Martin knew he was into her.

"I know! But you are into her. Kahit sabihin mong gusto mo lang siya i-kama, iba naman ang sinasabi ng mata mo." Martin laughed. Bongbong rolled his eyes.

"Martin. There is no such thing as into her for me. I just come for fun. That's how we live." He bragged and made a side smile as he discreetly looked back at Leni — his face pulled out to show no interest in her.

He knew to himself that he finds Leni extremely interesting and attractive but he didn't want to take in that fascination of her. He tried his best to shrug it off and just see her as how he sees the other girls.

—

Leni and Rody became closer as she always stood by his side in his office. They had the chance to exchange short conversations that eventually turned into sensible ones.

Their humors matched easily. They both love local things, they love donuts, they love coconut foods, they both have a tender love for their families and they both are sympathetic kind of persons. Rody aimed to bring out the best in her as he has always admired her unique beauty and perspective in life.

—

One afternoon, Rody called Leni in his office.

"Hello sir, may kailangan po ba kayo?" She asked — ready to do commands from him.

He handed her a folder of projects for photocopying. She immediately had them photocopied and returned to him quickly.

"Great. Great. Thanks." He handed her another folder and didn't mention what to do with it.

"Ipapa-xerox ko rin po sir? Ilang copy po?" She asked. He smiled. "No."

She felt bothered. She didn't know what she is supposed to do with it. "Uuh...?"

"Buksan mo" He told her as he felt her sincere cluelessness.

She curled her forehead for a moment in curiosity before she opened the folder.

Are you free tonight?

A piece of paper tucked in the folder said. A small smile grew in her lips as her cheeks began to turn pink. She looked at him for an explanation without verbally asking him.

"Ikot mo." He felt her blushing.

She turned it over and read what was written in it.

Can I ask you out?

Her hands voluntarily went to her mouth in extreme blush. Rody found her so cute as she struggled to suppress herself with his cute way of asking her out.

She had always found him cute and adorable and the thought of him asking her out just made her feel like floating with feels.

"So... Will you go out with me tonight?" He sounded like a gentleman.

"Parang..." She gulped. "... date po?" She continued and pursed her lips in exhilaration.

"Mmm... Parang ganon na nga." He confirmed and smiled at her. "Sino ba naman ako para mag-inarte pa?" She held her cheeks and shamelessly blushed in front of him.

—

Bongbong was ready to go home, scheduled to pick up Jewel whom Martin set him up with to have some fun session that night. He walked to his car and unintentionally saw Rody opening the door of his car for Leni. They looked so happy and he couldn't help but feel bothered and annoyed.

He felt so annoyed that he suddenly lost his mood. He wanted to vent out. He wanted to come to her and insult her and call her a hoè but he knew that would make him look so jealous and pathetic and he didn't want to look that way to anyone.

He ignored and tried to keep it off his head for the rest of the day but it was tattooed in his vision. He couldn't just stop thinking about it.

—

After some pleasurable session with Jewel, he laid his back on the bed and thought about Leni.

Kung may affair siya kay Rody, for sure napakadaling bola bolahin non. Madali lang saakin makuha siya ulit.

He assured himself and planned to invite her out for a night again.

[maximuswolf]

Applying the Satanic Rules of the Earth to my life - a success story via /r/satanism

Applying the Satanic Rules of the Earth to my life - a success story

TL;DR: Actively applying the 11 Satanic Rules of the Earth has greatly improved my life. If you’re thinking about it, give it a serious try. Go all in and I’m sure you’ll see results too.

————————-

This is a rather long post, but my goal is just to give people a “real life” example of how you can apply Satanic principles to ones daily life. Everyone’s life is different, but this is how LaVeyan Satanism improved mine.

BACKGROUND

After denouncing my evangelical upbringing (homeschooled, extremely conservative) and during many months of searching for the right path, I happened to read the Satanic Bible. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I didn’t expect it to resonate with me as deeply as it did.

Even so, it took many years to leave the Christian brainwashing behind. I was conditioned to forgive and forget, to be passive and compliant, to bend over backwards for people who didn’t deserve it, and to feel guilty for instigating confrontation of any kind, even in self defense. It took many years for me to really embrace the Satanic Rules and begin putting them into practice, including employing rituals as a psychological method to achieve my goals.

For those unfamiliar, the 11 Satanic Rules of the Earth as written in the Satanic Bible are:

Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

When in another’s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.

Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.

Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

Do not harm little children.

Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

While the writing clearly reflects LaVey’s quirkiness, the message here is solid. I personally don’t have any issues refraining from disrespecting someone in their own home, committing sexual assault, stealing, hurting children, or killing animals for sport, so I won’t get into numbers 3, 5, 6, 9 or 10. However, many of the others don’t come naturally to most people of Christian upbringing. It’s taken active effort to apply these principles to my daily life.

RULES 1, 2, & 8

I started out focusing on the rules that deal with keeping my mouth shut. It’s second nature to many of us to just spill our guts to random people throughout the day, participate in the constant bitching and moaning people do about everything, or give advice where it isn’t wanted. This just creates unnecessary drama and emotional labor. After working on this a while, I really noticed a huge difference in my friendships, my working relationships, and my home life. I no longer freely offer my opinions unless requested, I don’t complain to people unless they want to hear it (AND if it is constructive or will benefit me), and I don’t choose to insert myself into situations I know I’ll complain about. Basically, I keep my mouth shut about things that aren’t my business unless I’ve been invited to make it my business. As a result, I notice that I don’t get pulled into drama I don’t want to be involved in. It’s easier to stay out of things that aren’t worth my time and are really none of my business. I also get to choose what is worth getting involved in. It’s really freeing, mentally and emotionally, so i can invest time and effort into other areas of my life. Some aspects of social anxiety I struggle with were lifted, and I was able to put more distance between me and people I don’t care to associate with. At home with my partner, I learned to ask when to listen, when to give advice and when to sit back and just offer support. And I stopped contributing to the constant cloud of complaints that just hovers over my workplace. If i have constructive comments or opinions that will benefit me, I write them up in a professional manner and send them to my boss. I don’t bitch about it to my coworkers, which often doesn’t do any good. If I’m in a situation I feel the need to complain about, I take the initiative to change my situation rather than just idly wish it was different. This has actually helped me progress in my career as I’m seen as a problem solver who brings ideas to the table, rather than just pointing out flaws or starting drama.

RULES 4 & 11

So these rules are similar in that they lay the foundation for expecting respect and removing people from your life who do not give you the respect you deserve. These rules were hard for me because they deal with treating other people in a manner I was taught was “mean”, “disrespectful”, and “rude”. I used to bow my head to everyone. I never made eye contact. This stemmed from having low self-esteem and low self-respect. I grew up with an abusive mother and my father enabled her behavior. I was used to being treated like trash. It was normal, I expected it, and it’s hard to unlearn things than have been ingrained since childhood. I spent a lot of time thinking about what it meant to be an independent being with inherent worth and value. I needed to learn how to replace the respect I once had for a non-existant god with respect for myself because I am essentially my own god. I make the rules for my own life and no one has the right to impose themselves on my life, for which I have complete control and responsibility over. Then I got angry... and then I got therapy. In the process, I found a level of respect for myself and established a “no tolerance” policy for behaviors towards me that perpetuated my old mindset. Also, the introduction of regular self-empowering rituals (see the next point) have greatly improved my mood, my motivation, and confidence in myself to demand the level of respect I deserve from the people I choose to let participate in my life. After that, adopting rules 4 and 11 was easier than I thought. “Treat them cruelly” and “destroy them” sounds like strong language, but for me, this means “remove them from your life”.

For rule 4, I define “lair” as being my personal space. My home, my car, and anywhere I am privately. I don’t tend to invite people over, so I don’t leave myself open to this often. However, last year, I was sexually assault after a gig with my band. He was a friend of the drummer (who was also my friend and coworker) and had too much to drink to drive. His home was on my way home and I offered to give him a ride. Had I been the person I used to be, I would have blamed myself. I would have just let it go, not wanting to stir up trouble between this guy and our mutual friend. However, being the person I am now, I immediately made a police report (which is a whole story in and of itself) and pursued an order of protection (because he indicated intent to see me again at our shows etc). The male officers I spoke with told me that I should just “bring a cousin or brother along” if I was afraid for my safety. I told them I wanted to see their supervising officer. I reported them both and I got my police report. My assailant didn’t come to the first, second or third hearing and the judge said a single assault wasn’t grounds for an order of protection. However, at the fourth hearing, he showed up and signed a consent judgement, which essentially admits fault and agrees to the order being put into place. It is now visible on his public record and he has been removed from my path.

For rule 11, I interpret “open territory” to mean any public space where I am in contact with other people (work being the main example). I have encountered so many so-called “strong personalities” in my field, ranging from an openly racist boss, to an incredibly passive aggressive supervisor, to a verbally abusive staff member. In every case, I was personally and negatively affected by their behavior and it was impeding my happiness at work and my productivity, either directly or indirectly through negative impacts on other coworkers. The person I was would have kept my head down. The person I am now made a well thought out and professional HR complaint, all of which were taken very seriously and corrective action was implemented. Each individual was removed from immediate contact with me and I have progressed in my career in their absence. In addition, I have used these rules to remove my parents from my life. My mental health has exponentially improved since going no contact with them. I can’t even explain the level of emotional stability I have achieved through taking actions like these.

RULE 7

The use of magick.... this is the rule that needlessly trips everyone up. Ive heard some people say this is absurd and proof that LaVeyan Satanists believe in the supernatural. Magick is the act of causes change to occur in accordance with your Will. The only change that can occur is chance that occurs in accordance with nature. Ritual is a psychological method of manipulating your own mind to achieve something you normally wouldn’t. A basic example is your morning routine. Every morning, I have a choice. I can wake up early, take a shower, grab a cup of coffee, and plan my day, or I can snooze my alarm, roll out of bed, skip the shower and coffee. Personally, I am more likely to be productive and in the right mindset for the day in the first scenario. This is ritual. This is magick. My behavior affects my mindset. The physical motions I choose to go through have an impact on my future actions and the outcomes. If reading tarot or using special essential oils or performing elaborate rituals by candlelight help you achieve a mindset that allows you to achieve your goals, go for it. I performed “lesser magick” in various ways to increase my focus, decrease stress, increase motivation, and bring about change. I have also used a personalized version of the “ritual for destruction” included in the Satanic Bible in many cases to help me achieve the changes I want to see in the removal of people from my life. If it doesn’t work for you, it’s ok. Rule 7 says if it DOES work for you, go with it. Everyone is different and everyone will have different psychological ways of helping themselves succeed.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I hope it’s helpful for you. Always happy to chat with new (and seasoned) Satanists.

Hail Satan.

Submitted September 01, 2020 at 12:19PM by SubjectivelySatan via reddit https://ift.tt/2ED0IBR

[ah17hh]

Applying the Satanic Rules of the Earth to my life - a success story via /r/satanism

Applying the Satanic Rules of the Earth to my life - a success story

TL;DR: Actively applying the 11 Satanic Rules of the Earth has greatly improved my life. If you’re thinking about it, give it a serious try. Go all in and I’m sure you’ll see results too.

————————-

This is a rather long post, but my goal is just to give people a “real life” example of how you can apply Satanic principles to ones daily life. Everyone’s life is different, but this is how LaVeyan Satanism improved mine.

BACKGROUND

After denouncing my evangelical upbringing (homeschooled, extremely conservative) and during many months of searching for the right path, I happened to read the Satanic Bible. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I didn’t expect it to resonate with me as deeply as it did.

Even so, it took many years to leave the Christian brainwashing behind. I was conditioned to forgive and forget, to be passive and compliant, to bend over backwards for people who didn’t deserve it, and to feel guilty for instigating confrontation of any kind, even in self defense. It took many years for me to really embrace the Satanic Rules and begin putting them into practice, including employing rituals as a psychological method to achieve my goals.

For those unfamiliar, the 11 Satanic Rules of the Earth as written in the Satanic Bible are:

Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

When in another’s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.

Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.

Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

Do not harm little children.

Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

While the writing clearly reflects LaVey’s quirkiness, the message here is solid. I personally don’t have any issues refraining from disrespecting someone in their own home, committing sexual assault, stealing, hurting children, or killing animals for sport, so I won’t get into numbers 3, 5, 6, 9 or 10. However, many of the others don’t come naturally to most people of Christian upbringing. It’s taken active effort to apply these principles to my daily life.

RULES 1, 2, & 8

I started out focusing on the rules that deal with keeping my mouth shut. It’s second nature to many of us to just spill our guts to random people throughout the day, participate in the constant bitching and moaning people do about everything, or give advice where it isn’t wanted. This just creates unnecessary drama and emotional labor. After working on this a while, I really noticed a huge difference in my friendships, my working relationships, and my home life. I no longer freely offer my opinions unless requested, I don’t complain to people unless they want to hear it (AND if it is constructive or will benefit me), and I don’t choose to insert myself into situations I know I’ll complain about. Basically, I keep my mouth shut about things that aren’t my business unless I’ve been invited to make it my business. As a result, I notice that I don’t get pulled into drama I don’t want to be involved in. It’s easier to stay out of things that aren’t worth my time and are really none of my business. I also get to choose what is worth getting involved in. It’s really freeing, mentally and emotionally, so i can invest time and effort into other areas of my life. Some aspects of social anxiety I struggle with were lifted, and I was able to put more distance between me and people I don’t care to associate with. At home with my partner, I learned to ask when to listen, when to give advice and when to sit back and just offer support. And I stopped contributing to the constant cloud of complaints that just hovers over my workplace. If i have constructive comments or opinions that will benefit me, I write them up in a professional manner and send them to my boss. I don’t bitch about it to my coworkers, which often doesn’t do any good. If I’m in a situation I feel the need to complain about, I take the initiative to change my situation rather than just idly wish it was different. This has actually helped me progress in my career as I’m seen as a problem solver who brings ideas to the table, rather than just pointing out flaws or starting drama.

RULES 4 & 11

So these rules are similar in that they lay the foundation for expecting respect and removing people from your life who do not give you the respect you deserve. These rules were hard for me because they deal with treating other people in a manner I was taught was “mean”, “disrespectful”, and “rude”. I used to bow my head to everyone. I never made eye contact. This stemmed from having low self-esteem and low self-respect. I grew up with an abusive mother and my father enabled her behavior. I was used to being treated like trash. It was normal, I expected it, and it’s hard to unlearn things than have been ingrained since childhood. I spent a lot of time thinking about what it meant to be an independent being with inherent worth and value. I needed to learn how to replace the respect I once had for a non-existant god with respect for myself because I am essentially my own god. I make the rules for my own life and no one has the right to impose themselves on my life, for which I have complete control and responsibility over. Then I got angry... and then I got therapy. In the process, I found a level of respect for myself and established a “no tolerance” policy for behaviors towards me that perpetuated my old mindset. Also, the introduction of regular self-empowering rituals (see the next point) have greatly improved my mood, my motivation, and confidence in myself to demand the level of respect I deserve from the people I choose to let participate in my life. After that, adopting rules 4 and 11 was easier than I thought. “Treat them cruelly” and “destroy them” sounds like strong language, but for me, this means “remove them from your life”.

For rule 4, I define “lair” as being my personal space. My home, my car, and anywhere I am privately. I don’t tend to invite people over, so I don’t leave myself open to this often. However, last year, I was sexually assault after a gig with my band. He was a friend of the drummer (who was also my friend and coworker) and had too much to drink to drive. His home was on my way home and I offered to give him a ride. Had I been the person I used to be, I would have blamed myself. I would have just let it go, not wanting to stir up trouble between this guy and our mutual friend. However, being the person I am now, I immediately made a police report (which is a whole story in and of itself) and pursued an order of protection (because he indicated intent to see me again at our shows etc). The male officers I spoke with told me that I should just “bring a cousin or brother along” if I was afraid for my safety. I told them I wanted to see their supervising officer. I reported them both and I got my police report. My assailant didn’t come to the first, second or third hearing and the judge said a single assault wasn’t grounds for an order of protection. However, at the fourth hearing, he showed up and signed a consent judgement, which essentially admits fault and agrees to the order being put into place. It is now visible on his public record and he has been removed from my path.

For rule 11, I interpret “open territory” to mean any public space where I am in contact with other people (work being the main example). I have encountered so many so-called “strong personalities” in my field, ranging from an openly racist boss, to an incredibly passive aggressive supervisor, to a verbally abusive staff member. In every case, I was personally and negatively affected by their behavior and it was impeding my happiness at work and my productivity, either directly or indirectly through negative impacts on other coworkers. The person I was would have kept my head down. The person I am now made a well thought out and professional HR complaint, all of which were taken very seriously and corrective action was implemented. Each individual was removed from immediate contact with me and I have progressed in my career in their absence. In addition, I have used these rules to remove my parents from my life. My mental health has exponentially improved since going no contact with them. I can’t even explain the level of emotional stability I have achieved through taking actions like these.

RULE 7

The use of magick.... this is the rule that needlessly trips everyone up. Ive heard some people say this is absurd and proof that LaVeyan Satanists believe in the supernatural. Magick is the act of causes change to occur in accordance with your Will. The only change that can occur is chance that occurs in accordance with nature. Ritual is a psychological method of manipulating your own mind to achieve something you normally wouldn’t. A basic example is your morning routine. Every morning, I have a choice. I can wake up early, take a shower, grab a cup of coffee, and plan my day, or I can snooze my alarm, roll out of bed, skip the shower and coffee. Personally, I am more likely to be productive and in the right mindset for the day in the first scenario. This is ritual. This is magick. My behavior affects my mindset. The physical motions I choose to go through have an impact on my future actions and the outcomes. If reading tarot or using special essential oils or performing elaborate rituals by candlelight help you achieve a mindset that allows you to achieve your goals, go for it. I performed “lesser magick” in various ways to increase my focus, decrease stress, increase motivation, and bring about change. I have also used a personalized version of the “ritual for destruction” included in the Satanic Bible in many cases to help me achieve the changes I want to see in the removal of people from my life. If it doesn’t work for you, it’s ok. Rule 7 says if it DOES work for you, go with it. Everyone is different and everyone will have different psychological ways of helping themselves succeed.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I hope it’s helpful for you. Always happy to chat with new (and seasoned) Satanists.

Hail Satan.

Submitted September 01, 2020 at 11:19AM by SubjectivelySatan via reddit https://ift.tt/2ED0IBR

[ecotone99]

He Won't Stop Banging [HR]

My night shift in the Emergency Room began just like every other night shift. The waiting room was filled with the typical “emergent” runny noses and sore throats interlaced with the occasional true emergency of a chest pain, sports injuries or a patient potentially having a stroke. It always amuses me how the patients that truly are having an emergency are always so pleasant and thankful, while those that abuse the system regularly can be some of the meanest, nastiest and ungrateful people on the planet As I was attending to a patient that came through the door clutching his chest, exhibiting all the classic symptoms of a heart attack, one of the obese frequent flyers grabbed my lab coat. Her filthy fat fingers tugged on my sleeve, almost spilling her 1 liter bottle of diet Coke as crumbs from her Popeye’s chicken fell from her disgusting mouth and down her purple sweatshirt. “Doctor, how much longer do I have to wait?” I replied impatiently, “Like I told you the last four times you were in here last week, I’m not a Doctor, I’m a Nurse, and if you have to ask how long you have to wait then you don’t need to be here. Now if you don’t mind, I am going to take care of this actual emergency.” I ushered the chest pain patient into the back, before the purple Tele-tubby drinking her diet Coke could respond. I got the gentleman settled into a gurney, got his shirt off and started working on an IV while the ER tech began placing the leads on his chest in order to obtain an EKG. Now you see, I work in a small rural ER. We have one doctor and one nurse per shift, about four ER technicians and two Emergency Medical Technicians. So you can probably imagine how quickly we can become busy and patients can get backed up. Especially when a true emergency comes through the door. As the doctor and I were attending to, and treating the gentleman with chest pain, we got a call from our regional call center to dispatch an ambulance for an attempted suicide. “Great! It’s going to be one of those nights” I thought to myself. As the EMTs where heading out the door and getting in the rig, the lead EMT called out to me. “Mike, I’ll call you on the radio as soon as we get on scene and let you know what we’ve got.” “Ok Tyler. Thanks.” I replied. We got “chest pain” dude stabilized and transferred over to the cardiac-cath lab. No sooner did we get that done when Tyler called in on the radio. “EMT-1 to ER, come in over.” “ER, send your traffic, over.” “Uh, ER…. we have a 23 year old male with a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head. No current signs of life, over.” “Roger that EMT-1. We’ll see you back in a few minutes then.” “Uh Mike,” Tyler said, “It ain’t that simple. “Whaddya mean?” I asked. “Well,” he began, “The Sheriff says that the ME is two counties to the north workin a case up there.” “Yeah, so what’s that have to do with us?” I asked. “Sheriff says that Doc J. has to pronounce the victim dead since the ME isn’t here.” “Well, I can’t let Doc leave.” I responded. “Yeah I know.” said Tyler, “That’s why we’re bringing the body back there.” “You’re What?” “Yep, we’re bringing him back.” Tyler stated, matter-of-factly. I paused for a few moments thinking about where we would put our new “Patient.” “Roger that. We’ll put him in the trauma bay.” and we ended the conversation. It was 10:30pm by the time Tyler and Scott got back with the body. Our trauma bay was only big enough for a single bed. We kept our adult and pediatric crash carts in there as well as our Pyxis medication station. I decided to close the bay doors to keep the looky-loos from getting too curious as Doc J. came into the room. “Put the five lead on him just so we can say for sure.” he said. I put the leads on the patient and turned the monitor on. The monitor showed no electrical activity, which was no surprise to anyone. “Okay,” Doc J. said, “let’s make time of death 2235.” “2235 it is.” I replied. “Okay Melissa, you can take the leads off now.” Melissa took the leads off and I pulled the sheet over the patient’s head. I then began the daunting task of getting a hold of the nursing supervisor so that she could call in the histology technician. Since our hospital was so small, our histo-tech also doubled as the morgue custodian. It took over an hour to get a hold of the tech, and she said that she was out of town, but could be there in an hour and a half. As the waiting room started to thin, I had to go into the trauma bay to pull meds from the Pyxis. In my line of work, I’ve been around many dead bodies but, the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up. I tried to rationalize it as just being tired. I grabbed the meds, and left the room. About 15 minutes later, I had to get more medications. I was facing the Pyxis with my back towards the body. Again, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I could have sworn that I heard the sheet that covered the body rustle. I quickly turned around to look at the body. His right arm was hanging over the edge of the gurney. “Did we put both arms under the sheet or not?” I asked myself. I couldn’t remember. Either way, I was starting to get really creeped out. Every zombie movie that I had seen and every zombie book that I had ever read came flooding back into memory. I put his arm back on the gurney and under the sheet, and then I high-tailed it out of there. I was sitting at the nurses station about a half hour later when I realized that I forgot to do my pre-shift crash cart check-offs because of how busy we were. “Shit!” I mumbled under my breath. I really DID NOT want to go back in that room. I reluctantly got up, and headed in to do my checks. I was totally psyching myself out. As soon as I entered, I got that feeling again. The hair on my neck was standing straight up and so was the hair on my arms. “Knock it off” I told myself. I walked over to the crash cart and started performing my checks. I had my back to the body and I could have sworn that I heard that damn sheet rustle again. I quickly turned around, but everything was as I had previously left it. “See” I said out loud, “You’re just imagining things.” I turned back around to the crash cart and the door to the trauma bay flew open. I literally jumped and may or may not have let out a little squeal. Tyler walked in and said, “Hey boss, the histo-tech is almost here.” he said laughing. “Man, you should have seen your face. Quit being such a pussy.” “Fuck you!” I said to his back as he walked out laughing. I was almost done, and then I could get the hell out of this room. As I turned my attention back to the task at hand, I felt something brush against my butt and I jumped. I turned around thinking that I had probably just backed into the gurney. I felt all of the blood drain out of my face and was frozen with terror. I heard a low, almost inaudible moan coming from the body and the arm was out from under the sheet again. “Fuck this!” I said out loud as I bolted through the door. Tyler looked at me and started laughing again. “What’s the matter boss? You and the “patient” have a nice conversation?” “Something like that” I mumbled as I rapidly headed to the nurses station. “What?” Tyler asked chasing after me. “You’re freakin serious” he exclaimed. “It was nothing man” I replied, “Just my fucking imagination.” “Yo, you gotta tell me what happened man” Tyler said excitedly. “It was nothing” I shot back tersely. “Don’t you have vital signs to take?” I snapped at him. “What ever man. You’re losing it bro” he shot back as he turned to walk off. The histo-tech finally arrived around quarter after one in the morning. She walked into the trauma bay to survey the body. I purposefully stayed out. I didn’t want to go back in there if I didn’t have to. A couple of minutes later she came over to the nurses station and said, “I’m going to need help bringing him to the morgue. I can’t move him on the morgue gurney by myself. Also, can you come help me roll him? I have to get the body bag underneath him.” I sighed heavily and said “Sure. I’ll be right there.” I walked into the trauma bay and helped the tech put the body bag under the body. I stood on the side of the body and rolled the front side of it towards me. When I rolled him, blood oozed out from the exit wound on his head. “Take it easy pal.” It came from the body. I instinctively let go of the body and stepped back. The body rolled back towards the tech. “Hey, what the?” she exclaimed. “Did you hear that?” I asked incredulously. “Hear what?” she asked. “He told me to take it easy.” I explained. “Who” she asked. “Him” I pointed to the body. “Ha ha” she said, “Real funny.” “Jesus Christ. I must be losing my mind. Let’s just hurry this up and get it over with.” I said. We finished rolling the body and zipping up the body bag. As we were going out of the door heading towards the morgue, I grabbed a radio and shouted to the crew, “I’ll be right back. I’ve got the radio if you need me.” As we pushed the gurney down the hallway, I depressed the transmit button on the radio. “Radio Check.” nothing but static. “That’s unusual” I thought to myself. Our radios are digital so there’s never any static over the network. I shrugged it off, and kept going. As we got closer to the morgue, more and more static was emitting from the radio. I tried to call back to the ER, but there was no response. The tech unlocked and opened the door. “That’s weird” she said and stopped in her tracks. “What’s weird?” I asked. “Well, I purposefully left the lights on when I left because I knew that we were coming right back down. Now they’re off.” “Well,” I started, “They’re probably on motion sensor. If there’s no movement, they shut off to conserve energy like the rest of the hospital.” “No,” she replied, “We haven’t received those upgrades yet.” So, as much as I didn’t want to, I walked into the pitch black morgue, and turned the lights on. I walked into the other two rooms inside the morgue and turned those on too. “Nobody here.” I said. We wheeled the body in and the tech went over to the refrigeration unit and pulled out the morgue’s gurney. All of the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck were standing up again. I looked at the tech and said, “Ya know, I’ve been around a lot of death, being in Afghanistan and working in the ER, and it’s never truly bothered me. But…Something about tonight is really freaking me out.” “You’re probably just tired. You’ve been working a lot of nights lately.” “Yeah, maybe.” The radio squawked. I picked it up and pressed the transmit button. “ER, this is Mike, over.” No response other than static. Lots of static. In fact there was continuos static as if it were a “hot mic”. The tech and I looked at each other. I shrugged and said, “Let’s hurry this up.” We moved the body onto the morgue gurney and from the radio through the static I heard, “Not yet.” It came through as a whisper. “Did you hear that?” I almost screamed at the tech. All of the color draining out of her face and her shaking hands told me that she had. We both simultaneously went to the gurney, and hurriedly rolled it into the refer and slammed the door shut. We both just stared at each other breathing heavily for about thirty seconds. The whisper from the radio became louder and louder until it became a yell. “not yet.” “Not Yet.” “NOT YET!” and then the radio went silent. THUMP. We both jumped. The thump came from the refer. We were both paralyzed with fear. Then the unmistakeable sound of a zipper being zipped, or should I say unzipped came from the refer. Now I swear to you. I’ve been in several fire fights, and ambushes and I’ve NEVER been frozen in fear. But this, this was different. This was something I hadn’t been trained for or experienced before. BANG! The tech and I both jumped. The bang came from the INSIDE of the refer door. BANG! There it was again. It was strong this time. You could actually see the door move from the strike. The banging continued, rapidly, not stopping. The tech and I exchanged a quick glance and then we both hauled ass out of there. She went out first, and I followed, slamming the door shut. “Lock the fucking door” I shouted frantically. Her hands were shaking as she did. We both ran as fast as we could back to the ER. We went to the break room, both out breath. Tyler looked at us and chuckled. “Why you guys out of breath? Gettin freaky in the morgue?” He looked over at us trying to see if maybe he was right and we must have looked pretty bad because he got real serious, real fast. “Holy shit, are you guys ok?” he asked. “What happened?” The tech started to speak, but I cut her off. “Nothing” I said sternly. “We just kind of psyched each other out is all.” and I shot her a quick look as if to say, “Don’t say a fucking word.” She almost imperceptibly shook her head. I left the break room, went to the nurses station and called the nursing supervisor. When she answered, I said “Listen, I need you to get down here right away.” “What’s the matter?” she asked groggily, clearly annoyed. “Just get down here” I said, and hung up the phone. When she walked into the ER, she looked pissed. She came up to me and was about to read me the riot act and then stopped. She looked at me and said, “Are you ok? You look pale.” “No” I said, “That’s why I called you down here. I’m very sick and I have to leave.” “Well,” she began, “You can’t leave until I get someone in here to cover for you.” “Look,” I snapped at her, “I’m not asking for your fucking permission.” I grabbed my keys and headed for the parking lot. I must have been doing at least 80mph on the way home. I ran to my front door, put the key in the lock, opened and went through the door. I quickly slammed it shut and made sure that it was locked. I went upstairs, pulled out the 12 gauge and loaded it with slugs. I took it with me and went down into the kitchen, took out my bottle of Jack Daniels, and took a long pull from the bottle. It burned like hell, but soon after, my hands finally stopped shaking. I went back to the front door just to make sure that it was locked. I went back upstairs, and turned all of the lights and the TV on. I laid down on the bed with my shotgun across my chest, and then started laughing. Slowly at first, and then hysterically. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I said out loud. “You know you just imagined that shit.” I guess I dozed off because I woke up with my heart beating out of my chest. It was quiet. Almost too quiet. And then I heard it. BANG BANG BANG, coming from the front door. I’m scared shitless. I don’t know what to do. I’m too scared to move from my bed.

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[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Sometimes my brother stays in the house all night. And annoys my kid.

But after tonight i see why.

He had to register his hands as militant weapons. He said militant. lol.

He was in karate all through elementary minus some years and some high school.

He knocked me out with two fingers once then started crying cause he thought I was dead. My mom didn't care. She told him good job.

My little brother paralyzed my arm once by jabbing it. That shit hurt. It was temporary but my arm was sore for days.

So obviously neither are afraid. They have skills,i always believed out powered my own.

I woke my brother up to open a jar but he couldn't either so soon after he went to his home. He said for some,reason no one was outside.

He knows Jesse i know he does cause we used to work the same gas station. Jesse and Stewie are the same but I call him stewie after the Family Guy baby cause he always tries to kill his mom.

He went to ministry school for college and has all kinds of degrees in philosophy and church and all that.

Anyways stewie got a job with my brother at nights and my brother got him fired.

I got him banned but our boss was a bitch thinking about her pussy.

Anyways. So he gets those feels when,there is dumb asses thinking they got a brain.

Me and my kid do too but its different. We don't live by them.

Usually she comes out for a little while with me but she said tonihht she had a feeling she djdnt want,to.

But I know at home,she gets them. Because one of us will sleep,at different times and one of us is always awake.

Thats whn i knpw some type monster you wish only lived under beds has been outside,

I dont say anything. But I think we both know.

.....

I went out again, this time with the light off and smoked. 4th cigar later and my sinus feel great!!

....

I could hear joints pop. Starchy grass being stepped on. And a chain.

I could feel a vehicle's presence. One with people in it.

.....

I heard the truck start drive slowly up,the north mesa. I could hear for so long i knew they were stopped.

...

Random dogs had barked. First in the yard then one 3 acres away. Then in the yard again.

I listened to how many birds chirped and how.

....

I knew someone was there when i moved my foot there was another sound... When you concentrate on doing something and you focus on it... I didn't hear the sound until i had already focused to move..its a random thing but always valid. If i move my foot someone else is moving theirs.

Its a constant.

......

I said shhh to the dogs. I whispered a loud hey that echoed to the weakling that couldn't stand still on the other side of the fence.

No one appropriately responded.

.....

I heard the there's a mother fucker there bark.

....

So i went in and as soon as I did that coward ass took off running to his waiting truck.

.....

I unfortunately can feel people's emotions. So i felt him being terrified. I also felt his chest heaving after running when i went in.

I feel his backward heart hurt the last two nights.

.....

#fbi he wants to kill me but he doesn't know how. Hes wanted to for 20 years after he believed jesse James killed my kids. That's why other people call him Jesse. Ive admitted to be fuddled about certsin things and barely have a glimpse of things. He had me,take an abundance of pills once to over dose. Right after the babies were murdered by their grandpa.

And hes tried to kill me and Annie multiple times.

The only person he has a right to kill is himself or anyone that is trying to kill him -- except when he decided to kill them first. Like me. Because I will kill him.

But if someone like wanted to mug him and had a gun then its okay to defend yourself as best as you can. The goal being to get them away from you and disarmed if possible. But not always death is the answer dependin on who it is.

.....

And since he collaborates with Denise, she focuses him on killing me. So he has a right to kill her to shut her up. Becsuse this is an extreme 20 plus year issue. Its not an issue for every one. Its not always the answer.

But in this case it is.

......

Stewart often has someone drop him off where i am,then he walks where I can see him. Then he has them pick him up.

Lately I've honked at him and given him the bird. Just so he knows i see him and i still hate him and i will kill him.

Denise was driving today so i couldn't but i yelled my hate at him,anyways.

.....

Weird was when i got,to the gas station there was a black girl in the back seat of a red SUV with huge eyes like she was a victim of human trafficking. But I always see cops there. And all the Windows were down. IDK why people look like that. Last,time they were worrief about my tire. Windows were down some,dude was outside smoking. She could had screamed. She seemed to be the only one there,

Just a random thing.

------

I was really worried about him going through the,gate. Because they wantef me to sit where I was safe and could see through the fence. But i was super close to the gate and i could hear him within the outer fence. Theres like 4 fences and shit... So he was within the half yard where I was but outside of,the porch fence.

So trespassing. New Mexico law is i can fight back with an equal or lesser weapon. Since he uses needles... And I'm handicapped. I can use a broom, chair, table. Pretty much anything i want but a gun. I could use a knife cause they're close to needles. He uses insulin so a big butcher knife.. Since I'm diabetic ... Insulin won't bother me much but he does use extremely high doses which would cause me to pass out. So then i would be able to equalize that with a stun gun which i have, pepper spray which i have. And blood loss from a butcher knife will cause him to pass out.

Now here I'm not suppose to equalize his crime and kidnap him.

But since I know he wants to kill me, has kidnapped me, etc....

They asked me what i would say if he ends up missing.

I don't care. That was my answer. I don't fucking care. Ive been complaining about him for years.

He tried to kill me and my daughter Annie. Hes constantly harassing us. He follows us. There's records.

If i go through the trouble of disposing him. Dude. They already fucking know where he is. They fucking watch me. They can push rewind on the dam satellite,

So seriously. I go through the trouble of disposing him myself or with my family don't fucking say shit but thank you snd pay me a reward.

Call me,crazy but im fucking telling you. So PREVENT IT.

Or don't bother arresting me or asking where is currently 50 extra pound ass is.

Lets not play dumb, here. Get someone smarter than you if you don't understand, #FBI

Self defense. Hes a threat and has been. Hrs fucking crazier than me,

We all know i can go sociopath, psychopath, serial killer. I can do them all all day any day.

Yes he is crazier than me because he can't go sane.

And despite me sounding crazy. I am actually sane.

......

So. He is terrified of me. He asked me about a year ago to let him help me load my groceries on the black tread at the store. He was shaking like a leaf. I was PISSED because he came up behind me and squeezed next to me,to,get in front of me.

They're all he doesn't have his black bag!!!!! He wears a fanny pack to carry his insulin.

THATS WHAT I DONT GET.

hes scared yet he wants to kill me????

What the Hell. Stay away from me.

Then he will sit where he knows i should be able to see him and he eats candy and smiles all big showing his teeth like he just ate out some ones ass..

Telling me hes gonna have to have his needles out soon.

........

But they tell me he doesnt have his bag.

.....

He will and has tucked them under his dick on his nut sack. And pulled it out in front of me and my child.

.......

I will fucking kill him before he can get his stupid hands in his pants,

I do not fucking care.

Hes lucky i don't have a gun. Because h3 would already be dead.

That's why i don't have a gun.

I almost got one a few years ago.....

But i don't want to go to jail. So if he is close enough for me,to,touch on private property not belonging to him.

Hes a dead man.

........

Anyways so i was concerned for him to go thru the gate because I wasn't feeling the kill rage. So i felt like i wasn't ready so i was weary.

And i kept on although everything else was telling me,he wasn't but to my right,

So my left ear started buzzing like crazy and i was all fucking shut up i can't hear..

But duh. I didn't need to listen at the gate.

So god was there talking to me. Telling me he was there and ready to help me as i need.

To help me as i need.

Once i got the understanding then the buzzing quit.

And I knew to focus my ears to my right.

....

I wasn't alone and,had a lot of support and understanding from a legend. She was really awesome in being curious and understanding. It was pretty awesome. She has a clear and strong voice. I bet she will be a guardian angel one day and i know she will be awesome at it. I was starting to wonder if she was dead because she was so good.

She's not but yeah i was like whoa. I could trust her. Its unusual.

Just because she was awesome doesn't mean she's near death, its just an Earth skill.

I trust the dead most because they can go anywhere even under water.

And i felt i could trust her just as much as a spirit sent from Heaven.

.....

I can hear stewart again.

......

[sparklyeaglepoetry-blog]

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Versus the base 4.7L. The truck is a 2006 if that makes a difference.

Car insurance question. UK only please?

Hi. 18 months ago me and my hubby went bankrupt (long story) and we have had our new car insurance quote from the company we have been with for 12 years. It jumped from 37 to 60 and we were pretty outraged and so have been shopping around. We were told by someone we know that any new insurance companies would do a credit check and that we may be refused insurance or may get pretty high premiums. As I said, we have been with our insurance company for 12 years and have paid on time every month by direct debit for the car insurance and for the home contents and pet one too. So as your premium is affected by your credit score, does this mean we should have let our insurance company know we went bankrupt, when we did back in Nov 2010? Or does it not count as we were already with them? i don't seriously see why we should've HAD to tell them, but I am not a bit worried. I don't want to make a claim and find that they refuse it because we didn't tell them of the bankruptcy!""

What happens if your auto insurance gets canceled because you couldn't make the payment?

I have Esurance and I live in Florida where it is required to have car insurance. The policy is for 2 cars (mine & my husbands) and I can't afford the payment of $460 right now, which is due on the 13th, otherwise, they will cancel my policy. They can't give me any extensions. What happens if the policy gets canceled? How hard is it to reactivate it again? Is it harmful go have a lapse in coverage for a week or two (hoping of course that there are no accidents during this time). Both cars are financed and the finance companies require insurance as well... How bad will this screw me up? Has this happened to anyone? What did you do? Any advice would be great, and please don't tell me to just pay the bill, because I can't right now and it really sucks. I hate being broke.""

Car insurance questions!!?

I'm 18 and when I search for car insurance the quotes are crazy like 6000 to 9000, if I lease a car can I get something like basic or part coverage I'm new to this, I have a friend who has to pay like 100 a month and he has part coverage.""

How much would it be to have my car repainted the factory color and remove some pretty good scratches/dents?

my car was recently scraped by a post and mccdonalds and put some pretty good sracthes in my car with a good size dent and also completely ruined my running board how much do u think it would cost do have all this fixed at macco or if i claimed it as a hit and run would my insurance cover that and repaint my car or atleast half of it the side that was messed up and have ever thing else fixed

30 day insurance policy for newborns?

I am a teen mom and since the baby can't be covered under my parents insurance we are planning to do a legal guardianship, however you cannot get guardianship of an unborn child so we are doing it after he is born. But I was wondering if right after he is born if the hospital bills will be under my parents insurance because I have heard there is a 30 day period in which you need to get the baby's insurance arranged. So during the 30 days would the baby's hospital stay and everything be covered while we get the insurance arranged? Thank you!""

What would the insurance on a 1973 chevy nova cost?

It is not a SS it's just a 1973 chevy nova for a 16 year old. Would it be outrageous? It's not a souped up car really although the engine has some add ons.

Car insurance policies?

Okay so a friend of mine hit my brothers car in our driveway today. We live in Alabama ... my friend has Alfa insurance and my brother has country financial. Both have full coverage. When we called to make the report the officer that came said that since it was on private property my friends insurance will not pay that my brothers insurance will.. my brother has a 500$ deduct able. So basicly I have 2 questions. 1.) Just because its private property why will my friends insurance not pay for it? 2.) How much will be played out of pocket because the damage is about 1500 if not more. (Its a new car 2011, the door is pushed in to the point the door can't open and window can't go down)""

Do you buy insurance before you buy a car?

Say you picked a car that you want. And negotiated your deal? Who do you get insurance? I never had a car before.

What should I buy for my first car? Preferably something with cheap insurance!?

Okay, so I'm a 17 year old male in the UK. I'm looking to buy my first car fairly soon, but I realise I'm absolutely clueless about cars. I have quite a bit of money saved, but I would love to spend as little as possible on the car and insurance. I'm looking on auto trader and other second hand websites, but I really have no idea. Any suggestions of where to look, what make to buy, where to get insurance would be great. Thanks""

Car insurance question...?

If you have insurance on a car, is the car covered in a wreck no matter who's driving it?""

""Is $1,600 per year full coverage insurance good??? I'm 19?""

Hi guys, so I'm getting my mom's car in September. My insurance quote turned out to be $1,600 per year, or $133 per month. I'm 19 and I will be driving a 2005 Lexus ES 330. Is that insurance quote too expensive?? To little? Or around average. it's FULL COVERAGE insurance. Best answer gets 10 points!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!""

How can we get or is it possible to put a freeze for one or two years on health insurance cost?

I see BCBS is going up over 7% for 2011. Is there no stopping these rising costs? my poor pension.

Buying an insurance write off ( car )?

I was wondering if it was possible to buy an insurance write off for the purpose of using it off road, for things such as car trials and banger racing? i know that if a car is category C or below, it can be returned to the road after repairs, but what are the rules as to off road use?""

Info about 17 year old car insurance.?

Hi, so i have been trying to look for cheap insurance lately, but was getting insurance quotes for 44k and lowest 17k! but i changed up a bit of the info and got it down to 3.2k with mum and dad added, i dont want a black box or anything, if i were to ring up and get a quote from the company, could it be even cheaper? thanks, also please leave some tips as to how to make it cheaper, and if you ask questions in the answers!... i will reply in the additional info so keep an eye out!""

Is my auto insurance too high?

i am 18 yrs old. my car is 2008 c class benz. my insurance for the car is 315 a month!!! aaghh!! is that too high or it is a good price for the car i drive? does the car model matter? please help!! i hate paying this price!

Cheap car insurance for 18 year old female in uk?

Please suggest companies that you have used or know off that are cheap for this age group. The cheapest quote I've found so far was approx. 1780 but I need it to be cheaper. You help will honestly be appreciated

Your personal experiences with Progressive Auto insurance?

I just got a lease on a 2010 Honda Civic. Its the first car ever in my name and was a bit pricey for me b/c I don't have an extensive credit history. Progressive was the cheapest auto insurance I could find so I decided to try it. Any pros/cons you've experienced?

How does car insurance work?

I have a brand new car that has a 3 foot long scratch on the driver side after being parked on the street. It starts over the left front tire and ends towards the driver side door. I am taking it tomorrow to see if it can be buffed out, but if not I am going to take it to an auto body shop. How do I find out how much it costs? Next to property damage, it says $317. Is this my deductible? And how much I would have to pay? Can someone please explain this to me?""

How much will insurance be on a 125cc scooter?

I will soon be 17, and considering buying a 125cc scooter. It will be my first motor vehicle , never had a moped, car is too expensive etc. I live in a rural area so would be using it to get to nearby places. If i buy one, and after i take the CBT test, how much roughly would insurance be? Any other info on related costs appreciated.....thanks""

No Proof of Car Insurance?

I got a ticket for no proof of insurance, I forgot to pay it, now I must see the judge, I didn't have insurance, yes very very dumb, I know, my question is..will I just be fined or is there jail time involved. I imagine there will be just a heavy penality in fines

Insurance Company?

Does anyone know personally about the celtic health insurance. is it a good insurance company? I am needing insurance and I recently found the celtic health insurance company, and Humana. what do yall know about these?""

Will a cat D effect the cost of insurance?

i know the insurers value the car at up to 25% less so it's important to get a car that is atleast 25% below most similar models but what about the insurance group does that go up?

Cardiologist income and malpractice insurance?

What is the average income of an Invasive Cardiologist? about how much would malpractice insurance cost? how many years of school are required? how many years of internship?

How much is insurance for corvette?

What would be the rough cost for car insurance a year on a 2001 corvette with 60k miles. I'm 19, clean license and have good grades in school if that has any effect. I have a car now but was trying to see how much more insurance would be""

Insurance cost for brother with 3 points on his license age 20?

he got 3 points age 14, TWOC, now wants a car, how much do you think insurance will cost?""

How much does a new tag/insurance cost for a new driver ?

i would like to know how much a new tag/insurance cost for a new driver? im wanting to limit my options before i jump right into it. and what is the best insurance company to use??

Do anyone know where i can get cheaper car insurance?

Im with Tesco and am due to renew my insurance next month but what im paying at the moment is sky high. Ive been on the road 2 years now, I have a reno clio.""

I need afforable health insurance.?

I don't even know how to look for insurance but I need to find an affordable individual insurance policy in Nevada. I am a 22/female. However I am asthmatic (only mildly) and I take birth control for medical reasons (I am not sexually active). However I have never smoked, done drugs, and if I drink it will only be like one glass 1-3x a year, so hardly at all.""

Insurance quotes and maintenance cost for these cars?

1.Audi rs4 2.audi a8 3.audi r8 4.ferrari 458 italia 5.lamborghini aventador provide legit answers and not bullshit such as if you can afford it why you ask and so on

Would insurance be greatly different for a grand am gt and a grand prix GTP?

Im thinking about getting either a grand am gt or (preferably) a grand prix GTP. Would the insurance for those two cars be greatly different in cost if all the other things like coveerage, driver, etc is the same for both? thanks!""

How much will it cost me to insure monthly a Porsche Boxster 2.5 2dr Roadster 1998.?

Saw a very good one, will like to have an idea of how much it'll cost me before i dive in. Thank you.""

How much does car insurance cost for a teen driver?

I just want to know much it'd approximately cost. 17 year old female 2012 Hyundai Accent California resident I've taken Drivers ED and Behind the wheel Licensed in a couple of days My dad doesn't have great credit. He has 3 other cars under his insurance and my mom and sister. We also have farmers insurance.

How do i apply for medical insurance?

I live in santa ana orange county california. im 21 work part time and independent. what will i need?

""Who are the best car rental company, insurance wise and cost etc London?""

there are so many to choose from, terms conditions insurance etc anyone use them a lot and know the best to use""

How expensive would a liability insurance policy be for a Companion business?

I'm thinking of starting up a Companion business in Connecticut. It will be just me and I will not be doing anything medical. The State of Connecticut doesn't require me to become licensed if it's just me but I would like to have a general liability policy anyway. I would love it if I could some helpful information. Thanks, Cathy""

I need a motorcycle insurance estimate?

I plan to get a 2009 Suzuki GS500F Motorcycle in the next coming months. right now i don't have a drivers license, just my learner's permit. i take the Road test next month and if it goes well the month after i will go for my motorcycle license. I am 21 years old and i live in NYC which as many of you know is a high traffic area. I am a college student, My campus is about 16-20 miles away. on a weekly average i expect to ride about 80 miles or so. i won't be doing any stunts, period. there are two questions i have for you guys, 1). whats the best motorcycle insurance for someone young, inexperienced and new on the road? 2). Being that it is a 500cc engine and its pretty low powered motorcycle will my insurance be cheap, like under 200$ a month or probably something way above that?""

Is progressive a good insurance? what's the best insurance?

i got a great quote from progressive but not sure if they're any good...are they a pretty good insurance? or if there's one better?

What would be the insurance on a DeLorean for a 16 year old?

I'm about to be 16 and I'm a total Sci-Fi geek. I LOVE Back to the Future and ever since I've seen it I've wanted a DeLorean. Well we know someone who could get us a new one cheap, so that's no problem. My only concern is the insurance, and my parents aren't up for that. I don't know how much it is, but if someone our there is actually credible on the topic, could you give me a reasonable answer with a high and low. Thank you to all who answer :)""

How can I get my nose surgery?

I have a schnoz and I had it operated on like 6 years ago when it was broken. I've grown into it badly I think and it's holding me back from being pretty. And I alwaaaays think about it in public and I am very self conscious. Does anyone know doctors in California who could try and run it through insurance? I feel so ugly.

Cancel my car insurance?

My car is sitting at a farm on blocks. but l am still paying insurance on it. It's only liability. The car doesn't run. Should l just let it get canceled by not making a payment? don't know when it will be on the road again. perplexed

May have a preexisting condition and i need affordable insurance?

i may have a preexisting condition i will find out monday ,anyway we are on a month to month with a high cobra premium and it is kicking our butts my husband's job closed after 20 yrs we both are not working and if i have a condition how do we pay for it, how can i get i get affordable health with no job .help somebody i feel for people i feel for everyone who needs health care and can't get it what a shame i pray that i am well and the doctor has good news for me so everyone please pray for a good outcome when prayers go up blessings come down and i need your prayers i love my yahoo family some people are rude but for the most part real decent people live here Sorry for my jumby words""

Can I drive an insured car without insurance?

I got my G2 a week ago and I was wondering if I can drive my parent's insured car without being listed as a driver. I drive very safely and I've never received any ticket but my insurance quotes are insanely high, especially because I am a guy. I really can't afford it and neither can my parents. Some people say I can still drive and some say no and I'm very confused. Please answer if you know for sure. Thanks in advance""

How much does it cost for insurance on a scooter in europe?

I don't need an exact number, just give me a range.""

Is Renters Insurance Mandatory If I Rent A Condo?

I've been having a hard time finding a new place, but I came across a very nice 3 story condo complex that had one on the 2nd floor for an affordable price. A few people have told me that I HAVE to get renters insurance if I want to rent it. Is this true? It also claims I have to pay for the gas as well. I've never had to pay for gas before in the apartmetns I've had. Is this a costly expense? thanks!""

How do you go under someone elses insurance ?

im getting an m1 liscence and i was told insurance would be cheaper if i put the bike in my parents name and i was listed as someone who would drive it, so a few questions, would one of my parents need an m1 liscence, and how much qould it cost?""

No Proof of Car Insurance?

I got a ticket for no proof of insurance, I forgot to pay it, now I must see the judge, I didn't have insurance, yes very very dumb, I know, my question is..will I just be fined or is there jail time involved. I imagine there will be just a heavy penality in fines

Would I get a good insurance price for a 1.8 liter car?

Me and my dad are talking about my first car and I was looking online and I see one that I liked but it's a 1.8 liter is it a good idea and if it does matter it's a mercedes ce 300 1995 also would it come under classic insurance

How much is car insurance for a teen?

I'm 16,I have a 2002 Camaro SS,I live in Las Vegas,Nevada.(don't stalk me lol).My dad has Geico insurance.What else do you need to know?""

How much (on average) would private health insurance be per month for a family of three?

male 40 y.o., female 36 y.o., and child.""

Now that health insurance companies must give a rebate to companies for group plans?

that don't completely utilize coverage, according to an obscure audit formula, will those insured under the group plan feel guilty if they have to use it and it affects everyone in the plan's annual rebate check? And how will insurance companies make up for this loss?""

California speeding and no proof of insurance ticket?

It was dark and raining. I just came off the bay bridge in SF and am positive I was driving below 40 on the bridge and between 40-60 when I got off the bridge. The cop was on 80E past fremont exit. He said I was at 67 in a 50 zone and also did not give me enough time to look for my proof of insurance. He said lets make this easy and quick and cited me for speeding and the no proof of insurance as non-correctable. It this accurate? I don't think his radar reading is accurate. How can I challenge this?

What's the best auto insurance for a brand new driver @ age 30?

With a 2008 Honda Civic, and why? I already called and got quotes from places byt I wabt to hear from regular everyday people...""

If my dad is a co signer for a car will my insurance be cheap?

I'm 19 and its my first car and my dad is the co signer will my insurance be low? What are cheap insurance agencies for teenagers?

Looking for health insurance that covers IVF?

I am seeking health insurance that covers infertility treatment in the State of Md. Maryland is a mandated state for IVF coverage but I am not sure how it works with regard to individual policies. I know that if is not excluded from the policy that they would be required to cover it. Does anyone know how to get a reasonably priced individual policy that may cover IVF treatment??

What types of insurance are required in Minnesota?

I have a permit test in about an hour and I forgot what kinds of insurance are required in the state of Minnesota? There are 2 of them I think it's liability and no fault? Help please?

How much would my car insurance be?

I'm 21 years old male and I live in NJ. I'm thinking about buying a used car and financing it. I was looking at GEICO website and the quote came out to about $1600/year for 2000 honda S2000. I was wondering if that amount is right. I selected collision and comprehensive coverage along with all the other coverage options. I thought full coverage would be much more expensive like $3000 but that is so low. So I was wondering if that amount is right. (I live in NJ with my uncle and my parents live in massachusetts)

""Car insurance, Am i being Ripped off?""

so Im 18, and my brother is claiming that my dad has been ripping me off on car insurance for the past year since Ive had my 99 coralla, its a beat up car. I pay $70 a month, where my brothers gf is only paying $10, I have only liability, we are with country financial or whatever and Im under my dad, and my dad has three cars with them, so his insurance is like 30+ for full coverage each car. So is 70 bucks justifiable for me or is my dad lying to me, i never seen the bill, ive always have given him money when he told me to give it to him. (i do understand that my age causes my insurance to go up) im just curious before I confront him.""

How much will insurance cost for a 16 year old on a Mustang GT?

I work and I wanted to know how much will it cost we are currently on progressive insurance.

Help! driver's license and auto insurance?

so I just got my driver's license (im 18), but i don't have a car yet. im driving my mom's car, is that ok? do we need to call the insurance comany and tell them to add my name to our car insurance? do we need to pay extra money? thanx for ur time! p.s. we r in Maine""

How can I get car insurance without a guardian?

I live with away from my parents, Im almost 18 but not there yet. How can i get car insurance without having a guardian?""

Health care insurance?

My husband is on SSI and gets a weekly workers comp check? His income is non taxable . We did not qualify through the affordable marketplace for insurance for myself and son and did not qualify in Indiana for CHIPS for our child? We had been perviously purchasing our own private insurance but now I see you can't even do this anymore our current plan runs out in March of 2014 , and all thay offer now is temporary health care plans. Anyone out there finding them-self in this situation? Any advice ? Thanks?""

Does anyone know any cheap car insurance for 17 year olds in the UK?

Hi, I need some insurance for my Ford Fiesta 1999. I have been looking at some insurance qoutes but there still VERY expensive ( Around 6000-10000 ) I would love to get around 2000 for my car as i know its possible but i just need to find a insurer. Does anyone know any? Thanks""

How much does your insurance go up for a speeding ticket?

I was going 48 in a 30. How much will my insurance go up and how many point will I get?

How to become an insurance underwriter?

Im looking to move on in my career and I am really interested in becoming an Insurance Underwriter. I am currently studying for the CII FIT exam and was wondering what else I would require. Any help appreciated thanks.

What are the different kinds of insurance out there?

I know there are some insurance that is offered as benefits by your employer such as medical insurance and Dental insurance. By how do you get insurance such as car insurance, Home owners insurance. By the way what is home owners insurance. I might go to become a nurse I know a doctor definitely needs it but how do you get malpractice insurance. What is auto insurance? What are the other different kinds of insurance out there that is necessary to make a living with out in this world. How do you get some of these insurance too. I know medical insurance covers like doctor visits and hospital stays. Dental insurance covers Dentist appointments. Car insurance is suppose to cover if you get into an accident and I believe if your at fault of it your insurance goes way up and what I mean is it is more money you have to pay them. How would you get car insurance. What is home owners insurance, and Auto insurance. What is Life insurance. I know it is usually offered by your employee.""

I was rear ended. Does my insurance go up if I contact them?

I have Mercury Insurance and someone hit me in the back at a stop light. I got all of there info, but I was wondering if we went through this with our insurance companies would my rates go up? thanks :D""

Can anyone reccomend a cheap car insurance company?

My Husbands car insurance is due to run out the end of this month, however he is also waiting to see if someone puts a claim in against his insurance as he had a slight prang with another car, through no fault of his own. His insurance company have said that whie they wait to see if this claim is put through, the other person has 2 months, then they are going to charge him as if he has no noclaims bonus, this will be 120 a month. He just wants to find a company that will insure him for a couple of months that is cheaper than this till he sees if the claim goes through or not, if it doen's he will have 3 yeas no claims, hope this makes sense, thanks in advance x""

Insurance for motorcycle?

i live in Montreal Quebec, and would be around 18-25 years old would a Kawasaki ninja 250 (250cc sport bike) be more expensive than a 800cc cruiser? cuz i was originally intresetd in the 250 because of its fun factor and etc... but my uncle is saying that insurance would be a lot because it is a sport bike and i would be still young, so its better to get a cruiser (sportster style bike) because it is heavyer, stabler...and will cost less to insure. but im a little skeptical because a 250cc engine really is not fast (compared to the 600cc sport bike) and a guy on youtube said that his friend pays a little less than half of what he pays for his kawa. 900 custom""

""Im 18, how do I apply for car insurance?

my mom is a b**** and is dropping me from the family car insurance things and was like you have untill friday to get your own insurance I have absolutely no idea how this stuff works. and know that it will probably cost more because its for only 1 car. help!

Primary and Secondary Health Insurance?

I would like to know what health insurance company is my primary. I had health insurance through my previous employer. I worked until the 6th of the month and I was told I had coverage through them until the end of the moth. My new job health insurance went into effect on the 1st of that month so for one month I had 2 coverages. One health insurance company is saying the job I was at first would be primary until the coverage ended. The other insurance company (the one I had the longest) says they would be primary up until my last day at my first job. Then even though I had two coverages my active employers health insurance would be primary. I will find out from my health insurance company tomorrow what is primary but since there office is now closed does anyon know the answer to this.

Whats the best insurance company for a young driver?

just passed my driving test and was wondering what the cheapest insurance company for young drivers is?

No Proof of Car Insurance?

I got a ticket for no proof of insurance, I forgot to pay it, now I must see the judge, I didn't have insurance, yes very very dumb, I know, my question is..will I just be fined or is there jail time involved. I imagine there will be just a heavy penality in fines

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/louisiana-can-someone-make-you-get-renters-insurance-marieke-fleming"